dumbassCould you come pick me up? I’m hungry and these soldiers are holding me here. Nothing! I swear, I did nothing! I’m at the Hawara Checkpoint. Why? Um, I dunno. Okay, okay, stop shouting! I wanted to go to Tel Aviv. I know there are no Palestinians in Tel Aviv except for a few restaurant workers! That’s why I was going, no Palestinians. No, I’m not gay and running to safety. Mom, come on, I know you get it – all Jews, no Palestinians, I’m fifteen. THAT’S IT! I TOLDJA I DID NOTHIN WRONG! I was gonna blow myself up. Take as many Yahoodi as I could with me. I know you’re proud, just wait till you tell Poppa. He’s gonna shep naches. Mom, you wouldn’t believe it, but I saw a vision of one of the virgins . You know. Yeah, one of the seventy two. Yeah, those. So I saw one, I think. Yeah! I was on the Internet and found a site called Jewlicious. Mom, what does frum mean?

Yup, it’s time for another teenager to be captured wearing a bombing belt. In other news, Sharon and Abbas are meeting next week to agree to a “cease fire.”

About the author

themiddle

12 Comments

  • TM appreciates it when after months of posting, ck finally enjoys a post of his.

    TM wonders if this might be an auspicious moment to retire from blogging?

  • Speaking of this post, could you pick up the image from the jpost and insert it. Thanks buballeh.

  • TM, I enjoy all your posts. Even if I disagree with some, I still enjoy ’em. Ask anyone, they’ll tell you I’m your biggest fan!

  • See! It’s okay for us to post idiotic tidbits that have nothing to do with the topic!

    Now I must rub my neck in celebration of jewish life!

  • Actually,
    I think that he was going to Jerusalem and thank goodness for Jewlicious to balance out Jewschool. On that site, this ‘poor oppressed fellow’ might not have the right to kill Jews, but hashem forbid Jews try to find him before he commits the act, but up obstacles like checkpoints to make travelling harder and/or it’s Israel’s fault in the first place.