}

US Stoners? That’s Why I Don’t have a Gas Mask?

Here’s the scenario: Israel might launch a preemptive attack on Iranian nuclear facilities in the near future in the hopes of slowing down their nuclear program. The possibility of Iran building a nuclear bomb is not something that sits well with folks here and if tougher sanctions or negotiations don’t work, some feel Israel may have no choice in the matter. What is certain is that an Israeli attack will spark a retaliation from Iranian proxies in Lebanon. Such retaliation from Hezballah will include rocket attacks on civilians and given recent instability in the Arab world, some of those rockets might be outfitted with chemical/biological warheads. As such, the Israeli government has recently provided its citizenry with gas masks. However, because of budgetary problems, only 4 million were distributed, leaving 40% of the population without protection. I’m one of the 40% without a gas mask by the way.

However, in New York, according to Josh Nathan-Kazis at the Forward, one can buy Israeli gas masks retrofitted to be used as very effective bongs, for between $19.99 – $25.00. Now granted these may be surplus gas masks that had been distributed in Israel earlier, but still. I have no protection from Syrian-made, Hezballah delivered chemical weapons, but American stoners can get really, really baked using Israeli gas masks? Am I allowed to feel a little… incredulous? Can I please have my gas mask now? Please?

But in all seriousness, the Forward links to a web site that sells these Israeli civilian masks with filter for $19.99. Do not buy these as their is no guarantee that the filters and masks will actually work. Please buy from a reputable gas mask vendor who stands behind their product. Of course, those functional gas masks cost $200 and more but, well, a horrible death costs more so govern yourself accordingly.

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Publisher at Jewlicious
Founder of Jewlicious? Publisher? Man I hate titles. I coined the name Jewlicious and I slave over the site. I live in Jerusalem and I need to get some breakfast.
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4 Comments

  1. Tim Jew

    4/30/2012 at 2:12 am

    Too bad you didnt have them in the showers…just saying.

  2. Anatoli

    5/8/2012 at 12:47 am

    Send the jews to the gas at once! Also I like to wear women’s clothing and dance around the CN Tower.

  3. number324543

    5/9/2012 at 4:02 pm

    to the two jerks who have posted before me, anatoli and tim jew, you are nothing but freaking antisemites may you rot in hell with the rest of them!!!!!

  4. Freeman

    8/15/2012 at 4:41 am

    Gas the jews, before they screw ya!
    They’ll rip you off, and they just might sue ya!
    Gas the jews,
    Gas the f$(^@*$ jews before they screw ya!
    Also, I am a moron and I have to pay for sex.

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