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Vinny, Snooki and Pauly D spared God's full wrath

Vinny, Snooki and Pauly D spared God's full wrath

Last night in New York Aish Hatorah organized a swank, star studded Purim party at the Sony Atrium. The party was hosted by Chris Noth, Mr. Big from Sex and the City and included some of the cast from MTV’s Jersey Shore.

I know. You’re thinking a Purim party? Run by Aish? Hosted by a guy called “Chris?” Featuring a bunch of proud Guido reality TV stars?

Well, someone on high must have taken notice, because right in the middle of the party, some of the glass panels in the atrium came loose and fell, showering the VIP section with glass. Clearly this wasn’t divine wrath at it’s worst because, thankfully, no one got hurt. But I can just imagine the big guy upstairs thinking “Chris Noth? Is that the best you can do? Sex and the City was a million years ago! And frankly, I’ve had it with Snooki, Vinny and that “The Situation” guy. So yeah, here’s a little sign of my displeasure.”

Snooki for her part tweeted the following message: “Its okay Vin and I are still alive … Omg roof just collapsed at the purim event! We thought the dj was beatin the beat hardcore but nope,the roof couldn’t handle snooki and vin…”

That’s right Snookster. Your reality TV show and the foisting of your cast members on our collective psyches is so dumb that it offends both inanimate objects and dieties. Either that or crazy Israeli Danielle tried to kill Pauly D. Either way… wtf??

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About the author

ck

Founder and Publisher of Jewlicious, David Abitbol lives in Jerusalem with his wife, newborn daughter and toddler son. Blogging as "ck" he's been blocked on twitter by the right and the left, so he's doing something right.

28 Comments

  • Purim should ultimately be about revealing who you really are. This party and line-up was a prime example of Big Aish deceptively feigning to be something it is not.

    Thanks to NCSY’s deceptive JSU, Big Aish has direct access to our public school system and our youth. Just what we don’t need.

    http://www.ou.org/index.php/jewish_action/print/64255/

    Better out than haredi.

    Happy Purim!

  • I’m with Kelsey on this one.

    The “Big Guy” upstairs was thinking, “I’m pretty sick of Aish, so here’s a little sign of my displeasure.”

  • DK – Precisely what is with you and this senseless vendetta against NCSY? Not even you have equated them with “haredim” – you just assert that they ‘recruit’ for them, which is something you can’t seem to substantiate other than an article from 10 years ago. Show us some tangible products of this so called deceptive system and I’ll bite.

  • Precisely what is with you and this senseless vendetta against NCSY?

    Nothing “senseless” about it.

    Not even you have equated them with “haredim”

    Because I am a fair person. But they work with haredim. This is not in question.

    which is something you can’t seem to substantiate other than an article from 10 years ago.

    Bullshit. They work with Ohr Somayach and Neve Yerushalayim.

    God damn them for doing so.

  • Leaving aside sectarian squabbles for a moment (the only two things I know for sure about Aish is that their website is incredible lame in the way that only completely unhip people trying desperately to be hip can be, and we had an Aish rabbi out here who was a little to creepily programmed for my taste; he reminded me of a Scientologist: you ask a question and get a programmed response in jargon):

    WTF were a bunch of Guidos and Guidettes doing at a Purim party?

  • I got the invite and thought WTF??? Is AISH giving everyone a live experience of the kosher seudah of Achashveirosh that got the whole Purim story started to begin with???

    Let Aish explain the glass ceiling crash through the “codes” …. everything that happens is connected to the source… and if you want to connect to that source too, just give them a sizable donation and they will give you access.

  • DK We all are fully aware of your borderline sexual obsession with anything involving “fire” and “light” so keep your tantrum on your own blog.

    As any good Jewish org that cares about PR you arent going to prohibit loud mouth obnoxious tweeting goyim from Jersey from entering your party. Can anyone with a borderline psycho obsession dig up the flier promoting this event to see it if was advertised as “come get your goy on this purim with the Jersey Shore!”

    I think the outcome was pretty funny and can say I had a great time in super chassidish Monsey with my Rebbe and his chassidim and there were no falling glass objects or any fake tans.

  • I had a great time in super chassidish Monsey with my Rebbe and his chassidim

    What does this have to do with the post except to underscore that you are a flamer of a BT and a whore for haredi kiruv?

  • DK how long did you cry on your pillow after AISH hurt your feelings? Did you start your blog right after or did you sit in your room with the lights off and TV on for a couple months? Although AISH works for some people my parents connected through a chassidic derech and it worked just fine for me as well. If pointing out how butthurt you are after all these years and probably think about AISH at every moment you are awake makes me a flamer BT kiruv whore then that is a huge compliment.

    Maybe next year you can make it on the Forward Top 50 with Failed Messiah

    Until then keep your whiny AISH hissy fit on your own blog.

  • Kelsey has deep seeded issues and it ruins the laugh out loud comedy of this article with serious boo hooing of soiled bed pillows and a trashcan full of tissues.

    “Oh but in real life he’s a nice guy” – anonymous

    • Kelsey is a nice guy and he may have some serious issues with Kiruv organizations, but that’s because some of those kiruv organizations destroy lives and families.

      He is certainly right to bring up some of this animosity. What was right for you, LBC, is not right for everybody.

  • Torah is right for everyone 100%. The thing is that Torah is like calcium and it is essential for ones body. What happens if you are lactose intolerant? If you try to get calcium through milk you get really sick. So you need to find another way. The main problem with kiruv organizations is that they think their way is the only way to deliver the Torah and if it doesnt work then that person is a lost cause. Same for the FFB’s. A good kiruv org or just Jewish institution in general would care more about the person commitment to Torah and not their specific derech. With that outlook you wouldnt have a problem recommending another group to check out.

    Those kiruv organzations dont destroy families and lives. I wish people would man up and take some responsibility for themselves and stop blamming the Rabbis and the Man. Ive watched FBBs fry out and Ive watched BT do the super teshuvah and fry out like a flaming frozen turkey. Its all about Checks and Balances.

    You know what the real problem is? That now this article is serious when we should be LAUGHING that G-d almost killed 1/2 the cast of Jersey shore for desecrating Purim.

    Seriously though I always laugh at the “EX BT” what ever that means. You “were a MASTER” or something and now you arent? Its a joke. So you dont want to commit to Torah life? Its a big thing to do. Why would you make it your life goal to stop anyone you meet from traveling down that road?

    Its like stopping someone from drinking milk because you are lactose intolerant.

    • LBC, with all due respect to your path, Kiruv ruins the lives of people and families. It may have been right for you, but it is not right for everyone and if there are those who have suffered and wish to warn others, considering the full-court press those individuals are going to get from the kiruv organizations, it is a good thing to have another voice provide an admonition and warning.

  • Torah is right for everyone 100%.

    So in other words, yes — you are a Kiruvnik. And with what authority do you demand I leave Jewlicious, LB Chasid? Is it your understanding that Jewlicious is a Kiruv blog? Is that what you are saying?

    A good kiruv org or just Jewish institution in general would care more about the person commitment to Torah and not their specific derech.

    Then what the fuck are you defending Big Aish for? They are megalomaniac assholes.

    Seriously though I always laugh at the “EX BT” what ever that means.

    That’s what YOU PEOPLE call us. That isn’t how my friends or family see me. They see me as someone who like many went through an ultra-Orthodox experience, and did the right thing — chucked it.

    Why would you make it your life goal to stop anyone you meet from traveling down that road?

    To offer a different approach to the lies spread by sleazy, deceptive Kiruvniks who think they (or their rebbe) are Mashiach because the Jewish Journal or some other community newspaper does what they do best — suck Big Kiruv cock.

    Now go commiserate with your fellow heimeshes in Monsey about hot crazy “former BTs” can be for not laying down while you pull the same card Monty scams on the next victims.

  • @themiddle sorry but I can agree any less. You act as if the kiruv group commited some heinous act against them. Im sure the couple years they “wasted” living a torah life can be forgotten with a couple trips to Las Vegas.

    @DK
    Is someone into punk music and scene who wants to share punk music and culture with someone a Kiruvnik?

    If you are into something and wanted other people to check it out and be into the same thing you are then every faculty of society is “kiruv” aka bringing someone close to something you think is awesome.

    I dont want you to leave Jewlicious at all I just want you to quit your sob story because if anyone actually gives 2 anything about it they can go check out your blog chalk full of something or other. Is Jewlicious a kiruv blog? In a way I think it is. Its exposing Judaism to the masses so they can appreciate it in whatever flavor they want too.

    Im not defending AISH at all in fact I dont ascribe to their philosophical approach to Torah at all. I just think your “life dedicated to hating” is rather sad and dont want anyone to fall prey to your vicious antics.

    “ME People” I am just quoting your website my friend
    “David Kelsey, a former “baal teshuvah,”

    As in your mastering of something. Its like you went to college for 4 years to become a mechanic worked 10 years to be a master mechanic and then said the hell with this.

    I dont call you anything though as you are a Jew and as much as I disagree with your hateful views I will always have love for you as my holy brother with a holy neshamah.

    It should be noted that I am neither a AISH litvak OR a Lubavitcher chasid.

    I really wish I could see what “scam” is in the Torah lifestyle and then maybe I could help more people out on their way.

    Good luck DK.

  • Is someone into punk music and scene who wants to share punk music and culture with someone a Kiruvnik?

    He is if he is a FUCKING KIRUIVNIK!

    I really wish I could see what “scam” is in the Torah lifestyle and then maybe I could help more people out on their way.

    You’re a young punk. You don’t know what haredism is about, or how they lie and mislead. You have no clue, and that’s fine, you don’t have to learn, but if you aren’t going to learn, you have to shut up. You don’t know anything. You just finished college. Shmarya and I have been around the block.

    Go play your three-chord punk rock and leave these issues to adults.

  • @DK

    I was going to respond to this post but I dont want to steep this low as to personally attack you because it would be to easy and mean. Our mutual friends keep saying you are a great guy and I want to hold on to that image. When we meet one day we can hug it out. Good luck DK.

    • The hostile, not factual, responses Kelsey gets clearly show that he hits weak spots and nails on their head. As a Chinese proverb says, “The hit dog barks.”

  • Okay, everybody got their anger out of the system?

    Good.

    LB, not everybody who wishes to see Jews move to an observant lifestyle is a good person.

    Kelsey, not everybody who wishes to see Jews move to an observant lifestyle is a bad person.

  • Kelsey, not everybody who wishes to see Jews move to an observant lifestyle is a bad person.

    I concede that. But I would note that good people in Kiruv are well known for tolerating evil people because they “make them frum.”

    In fact, entire RWMO movements have failed in this regard…never mind the haredim.

    http://www.theawarenesscenter.org/lanner_baruch.html

  • Sorry, i just have to my two shekels, too

    Last Sunday morning, after attending a Purim Shpiel (in which they said “I hear that Jews are into bondage”, or better yet, when Haman’s wife is asked how her kids are, she has to recite their names very fast), I heard the news about the Purim incident at Manhattan’s Sony Building

    1. I was happy that no one was injured seriously
    2. I was sad that the Purim party had to invite celebrities, basterdizing the holiday’s essentuial meaning, and half expected them to say that Vashti was injured by falling shards of glass,

    and
    3. I was pissed that I wasn’t invited. What am I? A chopped liver filled hamantashen?

    ps – i hear that a character named Hashem will be on the Jersey show next season, or is it going to be on the BrightonBeach show? So many reality shows; I get confused