Oy

It’s been a while, but what can I say, the subject seems ubiquitous. First there’s news that Gwyneth Paltrow has turned to the Kabbalah Center for help in exorcising a ghost from her and hubby Chris Martin‘s swank North London home. The apparition, reportedly the ghost of one Adolphus White – a Royal College of Music professor who died at the property in 1902, has been troublesome and Gwyneth hopes to hold the exorcism before she is due to give birth in the spring. She turned to the Kabbalah Center at the advice of her pal, Madonna and the exorcism will involve the reading of Psalms and the blowing of a shofar.

If Madonna was a real pal though, she’d spare Gwyneth having to open her home to the rabble from the Kabbalah Center. Instead she should have simply lent Gwyneth a copy of her 2000 album Next Best Thing. I am certain that repeated plays of Madonna’s rendition of American Pie (track 4 Gwyneth) would have rid the home of all sentient beings, corporeal or incorporeal.

Next in Kabbalah news is Kabbalah, the off Broadway show, that until last week, featured Emily Stern, daughter of Sirius Satellite Radio Shock Jock Howard Stern. Turns out Emily (22), who was playing the part of Madonna, quit the production after fans of her father’s show threatened to take photos of her performing nude and post said photos on the Internet. Kabbalah, which has been playing since November, is now cancelled until they find someone to replace Emily. Apparently, Emily’s father Howard, who has made a carreer objectifying women, played a significant role in her decision to quit. Stern’s lawyers have gone a step further and are now threatening to sue The Jewish Theatre of New York for continuing to use Emily’s photo and videos (not frum friendly) on their Web site, and for not paying her enough (at all?).

Yesterday, writer-director Tuvia Tenenbom, a former Orthodox rabbi, told me nobody involved in the production was paid or expected to be – a common situation for cash-poor theaters. Tenenbom said Stern, like the rest of the cast, willingly posed and participated in photos and videos to promote the show.

“Amazing, the chutzpah that this family has,” said Tenenbom, who’s looking for a lawyer. “This is real [Jewish-American Princess] logic: They can do whatever they want, no matter how evil their action, simply because they are superrich.”

Oy.

In real Kabbalah news, it seems that Rabbi Yitzhak Kadouri, 106, Israel’s foremost Kabbalist is at the hospital suffering from pneumonia. We’d like to wish him a refuah shlemah, a speedy recovery – רפואה שלמה

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Founder and Publisher of Jewlicious, David Abitbol lives in Jerusalem with his wife, newborn daughter and toddler son. Blogging as "ck" he's been blocked on twitter by the right and the left, so he's doing something right.

12 Comments

  • the kabbalah eergy drink was on sale at new york duane reades last week. having come down with some sort of mysterious ailment (jerusalem bird flu?), i was spending a lot of time in there. approximately every 4.3 seconds of my wait for my prescriptions to be filled, the jolly duane reade announcer reminded us of this…the tagline is “source of power” (and yes, it bears a giant OU on the can). oy.

  • i’ve seen posters advertising the drink in the windows of convenience stores in downtown brooklyn too

  • Saw a truck, with two Chassidim driving, that was advertising a Kabbalah Energy Drink, on lower broadway today lol

  • Saw a truck, with two Chassidim driving, that was advertising a Kabbalah Energy Drink, on lower broadway today lol

  • Saw a truck, with two Chassidim driving, that was advertising a Kabbalah Energy Drink, on lower broadway today lol

  • Saw a truck, with two Chassidim driving, that was advertising a Kabbalah Energy Drink, on lower broadway today lol

  • Saw a truck, with two Chassidim driving, that was advertising a Kabbalah Energy Drink, on lower broadway today lol

  • “Not frum friendly,” was not enough of a warning. It should have said, “not human friendly,” or “not taste friendly.” The NYT review, which was terrible…did not do that tripe justice.