Hoppa!

Jerusalem has always held a special place in the hearts and minds of the Jews. Our daily liturgy is peppered with hopes and prayers for the well being of Jerusalem. We pray facing East, towards the Kotel, the ancient wall that once contained the First and Second Temples. Jerusalem, the City of Peace, considered holy by all 3 monotheistic faiths, has seen more than its fair share of tragedy and violence. Over the course of 2000 years it’s been conquered, plundered and occupied by everyone from the Romans, the Muslims, Crusaders, Ottomans and the British. Finally reunited and in the hands of the Jews, Jerusalem is now the undivided (for now at least) capital of the Jewish State. And yet, only recently has it started to possess the amenities of a real city – cafes, cultural institutions, a cosmopolitan air etc. In many ways, parts of the city, especially those populated by its rapidly growing ultra-Orthodox residents, are very provincial. Overcrowded and closed off to the outside world, these neighborhoods resemble the shtetls of old more than they do constituent parts of a world class city. Competing with Jerusalem for the hearts, minds and imaginations of the Jews is New York City. Possessed of a large population, a dizzying array of cultural and religious activities and free of the always imminent threat of disaster that seems to be part and parcel of daily life in Jerusalem, New York City seemingly offers the Jews anything they could possibly ask for – Knishes and Kosher Sushi, indie minyans and black hat Yeshivas, bagels and borekas. The current Mayor is a yid and while he’s kinda dour, compared to the current Haredi-approved Mayor of Jerusalem, he’s a veritable party animal. New York is so Jewish in fact, that even the non-Jews are practically Jewish.

So which city really is the center of the Jewish world, the ciudad de los Judios?

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  Jerusalem    New York City  
Jerusalem at Night

Latest Buzz: According to the latest population statistics, Israel, for the first time in over 1000 years, has more Jews than any country in the world. Jewish population in Israel and its capital, Jerusalem, continues to grow while that of the rest of the world continues to shrink.

Food: In Jerusalem you can now get Bagels, Pizza, Sushi, Chinese, Deli and Knishes. However, most of these aren’t very good.

Jewish Life: While Jerusalem has many cultural amenities, much of these are of relatively recent provenance – most of the tourist sites and activities focus on the religious and historical elements of the city.

Politics: Local politicians whore themselves out to special interest groups at the expense of the city’s wellbeing and diversity. Most famous mayor: Teddy Kolleck who presided over the reunification of Jerusalem and helped turn Jerusalem into a thriving modern Metropolis.

Times Square NYC

Latest Buzz: The New York Metropolitan Area is home to at least 2,051,000 Jews, representing 15.4% of the World’s Jewish population – this is nearly 4 times larger than Jerusalem’s 600,000 Jews. And according to Michael Steinhardt, US Jewish population is even higher.

Food: In New York City you can now get Borekas, Falafel, Shwarma, Hummus and Shakshuka. However, most of these aren’t very good.

Jewish Life: While New York has many religious amenities, the bulk of the Jewish residents studiously ignore them – most of the tourist sites and activities focus on the cultural and historical elements of the city.

Politics: State politicians frequent whores who will provide them with special services at an exorbitant expense – financial, personal and professional. Most famous mayor: Rudolph Giulliani who presided over 9/11 and helped turn Manhattan into a thriving, whore-free Disneyland.

Now vote! You can only vote once as we’ve tracked your IP address and have placed a cookie on your computer. Of course you could delete all your cookies and change your IP address but that would make you a dick and God will punish you. I think I’ll keep this poll up for 7 days.

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About the author

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Founder and Publisher of Jewlicious, David Abitbol lives in Jerusalem with his wife, newborn daughter and toddler son. Blogging as "ck" he's been blocked on twitter by the right and the left, so he's doing something right.

14 Comments

  • we are the jews you guys think all died out..the spain jews children of spain jews but with fiberoptic wifi and cartoon network .The place that gave you antonio banderes and penelope cruz.we are modern like you guys,infact we attend yale nyu make aliya dont make aliya speak yiddish spanish english..
    cut to the chase
    i think israel is more jewish cause its pure. i mean the bus driver drives the jewish way and the bus system itself is jewish..jews in ny always hold the tv remote control over the penis..in israel its on the table near the couch.ny jews eat bagels salty side up ..in israel its salt down. so its clear that israel is more jewlicious.

    jews spain murcia that is 43000 and growing….

  • The only people I know who eat horse meat regularly are the French. They have separate horse meat butcher shops called “Chevaline.” I think it’s meat for poor people. I like making fun of Calgary too, but Calgary is in Alberta which is cow country. Meaning good beef! People are still pissed that native daughter and singer KD Lange is a vegetarian. Cockfighting is not a Canadian thing to do. I think Jews in Canada, certainly in larger cities like Toronto and Montreal spend Christmas eve at a dizzying number of Matzo Ball, Federation sponsored type events. I know that growing up we most certainly did not go to Chinese restos on Christmas eve. I think that’s an American thing. You’d have to ask Muffti – he’d be more familiar with that sort of thing though I think growing up his family kept kosher too.

    Don’t be such a stranger Ramon!!

  • It’s probably, what, horsemeat and cockfighting in Calgary.

  • ck – glad you run recent comments, I don’t get here as often as I like anymore. Anyways, I should’ve put a 🙂 after my comment.

    Do Canadian Jews have that same suburban middle-class semi-secular tradition of getting the family together for a movie and Chinese take-out on Christmas that we Midwesterners do? I’m sure it’s different in Toronto with it’s amazing Chinatown district as opposed to, say, Calgary.

  • Ramon: Uhm. Christmas is just another day in Israel. I guess the equivalent would be… I dunno, foreign non-Jews in Israel, like Embassy staff, students, employees at NGOs and tourists who are here during say Yom Kippur. I don’t think they all get together and party at whatever the equivalent is to a Matzo Ball. Probably they stay at home and watch a video. Maybe they hang out at the Bar at the American Colony Hotel or go to restaurants in East Jerusalem. Yom Kippur is one of those days where literally nothing Jewish is open anywhere.

    DK: This site is owned by Mormons. But that doesn’t matter. This does not prevent anti-Zionist curmudgeons like yourself from voicing your shtetl inspired, workmen’s circle approved, Yiddish inflected, Bundist opinion here. Us Mormons are cool that way, even if we do have Jew-envy.

  • You can only now get Chinese food in Jerusalem? What did Jerusalem Jews do before that for food on Christmas after the movie?

  • “If I forget thee, O Jerusalem, let my right hand forget her cunning.

    Let my tongue cleave to the roof of my mouth, if I remember thee not; if I set not Jerusalem above my chiefest joy.” [Psalm 137]

    No contest.

  • This is nonsense, because no matter what anyone prefers, Jerusalem is backed by the Bible and the ancient prayers of the Jews, and because…oh, that would because this site is owned and operated by flaming Zionists.

    So anyway, congratulations on this daring and competitive contest.

    {greps}

  • Benji, I wouldn’t worry about it. I think the J-town/TA debate would pose more of a problem, because TA=Israeli NYC. Jerusalem is only Jerusalem.

    But let’s see what “the people” say.

  • If New York wins this poll, something tells me that does not bode well for the future of the Jewish people. There are too many people living in New York who are just Jewish by chance and equate Judaism with eating bagels and liking “Seinfeld.” (Boy, it hurts a little bit to look in the mirror right now. And to think, I was about to push for my beloved Tel Aviv as a write-in candidate. I guess I’m more ideological than I thought.)

    Let the fun begin!