Jewlicious

Paris Hilton to Marry Below her Station

19 years ago
54 Comments
by ck
101 Views
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Below her station!You’re asking how is this possible? I mean yeah, she’s rich and all, but she’s appeared in widely distributed amateur porn, everyone in the world has seen her oral technique, she’s a ditz, she’s been caught on tape using the “n” word, has frequented the Kabbalah Center and has no discernible talent. So imagine my shock when I discovered that she has recently announced her engagement to one Paris Latsis, scion of a Greek shipping family whose worth is about $7.5 billion. Latsis’ dad is also a well-respected mayor of a Greek town and the family is otherwise very conservative and religious.

So why is Hilton’s marriage to Latsis a step down? Well, basically because the Latsis family, despite being fabulously rich and all, make their money selling guns and cozying up to Arab dictators.

… the clan’s late patriarch, John “Yanni” Latsis, aided his storied climb from deckhand to shipping tycoon by profiteering on the black market during WWII. In 1967, Yanni drew additional scrutiny when he loaned his shipping fleet to the Egyptians during the Six Day War with Israel and threw his financial support behind Greek fascist dictator Colonel George Papadopoulos. (The title of Latsis’ unauthorized bio translates to “Gangster” in English.)

Fascists? Nasser? Black Market Profiteering in WWII? Seriously, even amateur porn starlets like the ones that can be seen at https://www.tubev.sex/categories/1194/amateurs have to have some standards! Don’t do it Paris Hilton! He’s not good enough for you!

Tip of the cap to Dave!

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ck

Founder and Publisher of Jewlicious, David Abitbol lives in Jerusalem with his wife, newborn daughter and toddler son. Blogging as "ck" he's been blocked on twitter by the right and the left, so he's doing something right.

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54 Comments

  • I’ve been watching Paris Hilton’s BFF. Where do they come across these people? They’re from another planet!

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  • PH is another money-worshiping scumbag. Although, were there any other kind? Never met one. ITS ALL ABOUT DA SHEKELS!
    🙁

  • I am confused…where did I assume you did not read the posts?
    well, I am checking this site regularly, haven’t quite found that much that appeals to me (see the remaks before), but I am ‘getting into it’,
    I am not from America, that is why, I guess. But that is more reason to keep checking the site, interesting to see how others look at things and the is for sure common ground..
    I am off for a couple of days, so I am a bit early when wishing you all a warm shabat shalom!

  • Amish. That is the one authentic view. And note that they reproduce at a rate that’s in line with Orthodox Jews. Oh, and they have similar-looking beards too.

  • Mormonism? How about More-man-ism? Or Moremenlesswaitingism. Either: I’m flexible like that.

    In any case, the battle for authenticity rages on. Dwash, welcome to Thunderdome.

  • yes different views are represented here, despite the fact that only one is authentic.

  • dwash, just because we’re not responding, you shouldn’t assume we aren’t reading. As for particular streams of Judaism, don’t be too focused on that since we represent different views on here.

  • CK: I made about three comments, of which three were highly sarcastic.But since that doesn’t seem to work, I will try to direct the readers with seriousness:
    I do not think this site is frum, I do not think you are a male chauvinistic pig

    However, I do agree, it does seem like any gossip is good enough to put up a (half naked?) pretty girl (or guy for that matter).
    I have noticed all kind of jews come here, but when I look at the blogs and most discussed topics it is either about dating, israel or anything related to orthodoxy. It is interesting, I am learning..I have a slightly different jewish background I guess..also getting more and more into the humor here!

  • ck, it’s not frumkeit that this site propogates, but a certain standard should be maintained imo, after all, what is Judaism. PH represents a kind of immoral lifestyle that is opposite of what Judaism represents, even leaving out rituals and synagouge and all that. It would not be oppressive if you were to take a stand and say, this skank is not for us to discuss even.

  • dwash: Uh… the notion that this site propagates frumkeit is kind of amusing.Do you know frum people? Does this site look like a bastion of frumminess (not that there’s anything wrong with that). We’re big on Judaism, it’s that simple.

    Similarly, the notion that I am a male chauvinist pig is laughable. But if all it takes is some pics of hot guys to dissuade you from that belief, simply click here to see some fairly hot Israeli guys. So there.

    😉

  • There’s a discussion at The Guardian which implies that my use of the term Arab Dictator is pejorative and anti-Islam.

    Hmmm. Not all Arabs are Muslim and yes, an Arab Dictator (or any dictator for that matter)is not a good thing. I stand by that.

    Otherwise someone made a comment about Hilton’s marriage being a “below job.” Oh those saucy Brits …

  • if this site is to propagate frumkeit, where do I need to go to find a site that is more about conservative/reform/secular judaism?
    But I agree..too much female nudity interest, what male chauvinistic pig is behind all this…or rather: where are the hunky men?
    And…I did not know Paris Hilton could lower her standards. You see, learning something new everyday

  • Oy Moose. It’s a subtle pro-Israel message. Do you now see why that is somehow related to Judaism?

  • I realy don’t see what you people are talking about.and still don’t see what this whole thing has to do with anything jewish.

  • Uh yes,

    to answer the question:

    Its all a matter of attitude.
    Are you being just imature or…
    You just don’t got it under control.

    Thats the best I can do with limited material available.

  • Ummn…perhaps you can inform muffti of the difference? Truth be told, Muffti has never heard of imature ejaculation (sp?). Is it like when you are pre-pubescent and ejaculate?

  • imature ejaculation? Soiling Long Johns? Frummies can do what they like wtih these images. They developed laundromats to help with soiled Long Johns. As for premature ejaculation, well, just think of Grandma in a bikini and if that doesn’t solve the problem, there are graver issues to deal with.

  • well we are playing with more then just fire…

    It could lead to like, imature ejacution and the like. You wouldn’t want to all these frummies here
    take these images to part and soil thier long johns?

  • Hey, if God didn’t want Muffti to be a pig, he wouldn’t have made him this way, NSN. Go and lay the blame squarely where it belongs, on the creator.

  • The Muffti is glad to know that he was missed. His power chord for his Mac has gotten, for lack of a better term, fucked up to hell.

  • And with the return of Muffti, so returns the delicate balance of Jewlicious. This is all very zen.

    Now all I have to do is find another story to post (any story will do, really) so we can bump that picture of Paris further down the page. What was the name of that movie with Debra Winger and Billy Crystal?

  • Muffti can confirm the story about Savannah. In fact, though, CK is being selective about details. Though we were looking rather ragged that day, Muffti did (on account of CK’s conniving) read the torah for the congregation which may have led them to be confused and ask the ‘yeshiva bocher’ question. Sheesh, CK. Those people were nice; give them a break! The rabbi proceded to take us on a pleasant shabbat drive through the town, which was lovely. Then CK and Muffti ruined Liz’s ugly boyfriend’s Savannah audio secret…but that’s a story for another time.

    Tzinius is not hot. Those who think so are, with all due respect, whack. And so long as Muffti is around, Jewlicious will be no bastion of frumkeit.

  • yeah, I hear you judi

    I don’t know that much about the info about this latest bit of papparazzi. Based on CK’s report, this Paris Hilton is as obnoxious or more on the inside as outside.

  • nsn, that was called a facetious comment. If you were to meet me, you’d probably think I was Orthodox. And indeed, I’m part of the observant community in my little city. Heck, I’m hosting a Haredi Rabbi this week. How many hoops do I need to jump through? It boils down to this- in my shul, women have a prominent role. This goes against the halachic standards of many OU-affiliated shuls. Although you could find halachic authorities who’d tell you that women’s participation is not assur. Like Rashi.

    That said- ck, I agree that the Latsis family has no right to be flinging stones at the Hiltons- even if they are large pieces of compressed carbon. As a shipping magnate, Grandpa John did whatever he had to in order to remain a shipping magnate. It’s doubtful that his grandson has the same work ethic, but then again, I have yet to see Paris H. taking reservations at a front desk. But given the track record of unions that are based on shared first names and tons of unearned money, this one may last only as long as the Six Day War.

  • “We conservative” like is that youre flag?

    My flag is Israel.

    Hypocracy Kvetch:

    I don’t even care for the orthodox
    label-flag-movement any more then reform,
    conservative….

    I certainly don’t see “orthodox” as having a
    monopoly for hypocracy.

    I am sure a lot of folk have heard this, but I
    would like to point out that a reason pig in the
    chumash is singled out for being not kosher is
    that it has split holves but doesn’t chew cud.
    Thus a pig would superficially like to make
    known its kashrut by sticking its holves out
    without being inside that way by chewing cud.
    I believe the pig is the only animal with such a
    combination of split holves but no cud
    chewing. That is an example in attitude:
    Someone who likes to present a kosher on
    the outside but not so on the inside.
    The truth is that pig is only one form of non
    kosher animal. There are many more, believe
    me….

    The point being that if thats all you fixate on, I
    would say that you are indeed overlooking the
    vast majority of “sins” out there.
    Bottomline: If you look at the total “sinfull”
    action people do, is “hypocracy” the most
    heinous? I am not being an apologist for
    anybody. I am an equal opportunity hater of
    labels….
    I have no desire to be labeled as an
    “orthodox” Jew. The very thought sort of
    disturbs me. People do that, but like so what?
    Who cares?

    orthodox…kaka…

    conservative… boooo!!!

    Reform… Yuck!

  • Hey ck, if you don’t increase my lowly station on Jewlicious, I won’t be able to correct your spelling errors, in which case some of us might think less of you. It also does not behoove you to have a post with spelling mistakes when discussing other people’s lowly station.

    In addition, when somebody posts a non-working link in the comments, I won’t be able to fix it, and it’s clear you’re not up to the task.

    Jus’ sayin’.

    That Muffti story about the Reform synagogue is another shrimp encrusted fish stick story you tell yourself to feel better.

    Having said all of that, I can’t wait until they have a kid and name it Paris Jr.

  • Good question Moose. The deceased head of Paris Lasis’ family, Yanni, sided with the Egyptians during the six day war. Furthermore these people currently have shady dealings with the Saudis and gun runners. My contention is that anyone who seems to be that unprincipled is lower than even Paris Hilton, an attention grabbing no-talent amature porn actress. See, the Latsis family is all horrified that their boy is going to marry below his social position, but really she’s too good for that family. Capish?

  • Moose, I’m glad you asked. You see, it started out as a discussion of tsnius. Evidently, to be Orthodox, you must be obsessed with naked women. This is yet another approach to Judaism that we Conservative Jews frown upon. ;-(

  • Rebecca: Coming from a theory slut, your admonition means little to me! And D’vorah? I forgive you for clearly you have no idea what you’re talking about ; )

  • The other stuff didn’t help to prove my point, so I pretended it didn’t exist, a trick I learned from the CJ discussion 😉

  • Puhleeze, the bagels thing was about white collar crime, not bagels – of which the Montreal variety are clearly the connoisseur’s choice. You ignore the article on the future of the Jews, A late night in Jerusalem and the kiddush for single woemn etc. Trust me. Everything continues to make sense. Except for Conservative and Reform Judasim. That stuff is just whack!

    😉

  • I dunno, dahlin’. Let’s take a look: Laya’s got a parsha column, Esther’s got happy dancin’ feet, TM is challenging the very essence of Judaic practice, Muffti is…. well, Muffti is being Muffti, and you’ve got Jean Van Cleemput. Oh, and bagels. But not Montreal bagels (which seriously rock). Nothing makes sense anymore.

  • Sorry judi. I hope you haven’t taken offense, but those are the relevant news stories right now, what can I say? I don’t make the stories, I just report on them. Now the notion of this site being the bastion of frumkeit, well that just makes me sad. Is this how far Judaism has slipped in America? Reminds me of that time muffti and I walked into a kippa optional Reform temple in Savannah. We looked like homeless criminals and we wore ratty jeans and t-shirts. But, we also sported kippahs. One of the congregants leaned over and quite seriously asked us “Are you two Yeshivah buchurs??” I guess it was rare for them to see 1) young people in their synagogue and 2) sporting kippahs. That just shows how far removed American Jewry is from what you call frumkeit.

    But for the record, I still believe that tsnius is HOT!

  • ck- what’s up with all the near-naked chicks? I thought this site was the up-and-coming bastion of frumkeit. I hate to interject my CJ vision of radical Judaism, but geez- haven’t you guys ever heard of tsnius?