A new site called AlmostmetJew.com identifies their mission as being there to “help Jews locate the passing Jew that caught their attention, but they missed the opportunity to actually meet.”
Aside from awful copywriting, the site has its charm, ie: stock photos of waspy male models with a kippah doodled on in what appears to be MS PaintShop.
Get the one that got away! is their tagline, which is a nice tautology (is this when Mufti tells me that I used the word tautology wrong?), but I see so much room for error when visual cues are the only thing identifying one as a Jew:
Hey big-nosed guy trying to parallel park today on 13th Street, wanna smooch? There’s just some strange disconnect.
Find That Female Jewess, You Almost Met one section reads, Find That Male Jew, You Almost Met reads another. There’s even a section called Jew searching for Jew, which to me sounds more like an existential struggle than a place to go looking for a date.
Best one yet:
I was shmoozing with 2 of my friends right outside Columbia Presbyterian on 168th street between Ft. Wash and Broadway on monday, the 30th of January at about 2:30, when you walked by. 2 of us noticed you, and I just kept on noticing you for a little while. Eventually you turned around to look back at us, and I was still looking at the time. We found the situation to be highly comical, and we took turns kicking each other for not pursuing.
You’re blonde, probably about 5’5″-5’6″ in the short boots you were wearing. You were wearing thick-rimmed glasses and a 3/4 length jean skirt.
The three of us were standing in a group against the wall of the building. 2 of us are about 6′ and the other is 5’10”. 2 of us were wearing black kippas, one velvet, one knit, and the other was wearing a blue knit. We were wearing coats, but I remember that I was wearing khaki pants and a brown sweater. I was also wearing thick-rimmed blue glasses.
We all thought you were cute, so it’s in our best interest to find out, especially since one of the 3 of us works at Columbia Presbyterian anyway. Also, just for pride purposes, we want to know which one of us you were looking at when you turned around. I mean, I already know who, but a little confirmation never hurts.