Obama Big SpinOthers WANT to be screwed…

Yes. That’s exactly what it looks like. Standing at 7 1/2 inches tall and made of the finest Phthalate-free rubber, this made in the USA “novelty item,” unlike the Presidential candidate it represents, promises not to flip flop. Available at HeadoState.com (Get it, get it?) it sells for a mere $21.95.

More than just a waterproof toy, this “item” represents the assumption in some quarters that once Obama is elected to office – all bets are off. There’s really no telling which way he’ll go, especially with reference to the whole Israel thing. We’ve already seen him flip flop on the Jerusalem issue – saying one thing to AIPAC and then having his aides do an about face the very next day.

I’ve said this before, but one can’t help but imagine that an Obama Presidency will never be able to live up to the lofty values and ideals promoted during the campaign. I mean “Hope” is nice and all but you know you’ll never be let down by industrial-grade rubber. Did I mention that it’s Phthalate-free? I did? Ok then…

Oh. One other thing. I’m really, really sorry about this post and the accompanying image. Really.

About the author

ck

Founder and Publisher of Jewlicious, David Abitbol lives in Jerusalem with his wife, newborn daughter and toddler son. Blogging as "ck" he's been blocked on twitter by the right and the left, so he's doing something right.

24 Comments

  • I can’t get a good look at that thing ’cause it keeps moving! (The image, that is).

    Your post seems to convey that the connotation is a purely negative one. I hope, for their own sake, that the proprietors of the website to which you link disagree.

    Flexibility in governing has become under-rated in this era of obsession with message. Being too hard and inflexible makes one brittle, and brittle things break easily. And when they have no substance, they shatter. Phthalate-free or not.

  • Only 5 Hillary nutcrackers are left. It looks like supplies have dwindled so as to better match demand. Hillary dildoes, on the other hand…

  • ck, what’s with the existential angst? Not only are you not a US voter, but why can’t you take “all bets are off” and “no telling” for an answer?

    Think just a little more diligence in parsing Obama’s Delphic pronouncements will at last free you to join your lefty pals who’ve already embraced Obama as the messiah?

  • Tom: Parsing’s for people who want to change what they hear into what they want to believe. Context is for people who want to understand what they hear first, and then see perhaps if that fits what they believe. Of course, if your only source for context is whether or not someone fits into the pretty much discredited neoconservative philosophy, then that doesn’t provide much context to go on now, does it?

    Alex’s rich imagination provides a much more amusing sense of context for what he sees in everything: Terrorism, Anti-Americanism, Socialism, Anti-Americanism, Anti-Americanism. Perhaps he could look to you for guidance in schooling him on the finer points of seeing anti-neoconservatism in everything, instead. It’s a little narrower approach, but more coherent.

    Courtroom heuristics are not generally applicable to political communication. But then again, not every lawyer is talented enough to become a successful politician, let alone a highly admired and intellectually capable one.

  • Seriously though, pthalates can cause false positives in PAP smears if used before the test and really are not healthy for the cervix, so everyone should check their toys and throw out their old ones. This has been a PSA from Chutzpah.

  • Is that thing anatomically correct? It looks like the huevos are facing in the wrong direction.

    They probably did that just so it would stand up, but still…..

  • I guess Annie Lennox was right: “Some of them want to use you, some of them want to be used by you. Some of them want to abuse you, some of them want to be abused.”

  • Sheela: The specs on that object say it’s only 7.5 inches high and 2 inches thick. Nothing to be envious about there. Well… that golden color is kinda cool… but other than that…

  • CK, I can’t believe you are going to be a Obama shaped dildo and ignore the Dov Charney living with little boys article. Is the American Apparel banner ad on the top of this blog bringing in that much money?

  • MUL:

    “Alex’s rich imagination provides a much more amusing sense of context for what he sees in everything: Terrorism, Anti-Americanism, Socialism, Anti-Americanism, Anti-Americanism. Perhaps he could look to you for guidance in schooling him on the finer points of seeing anti-neoconservatism in everything, instead. It’s a little narrower approach, but more coherent.”

    You native born Westerners are sure such naive folk. Didn’t you ever listen to what Bubba and Zeda ever said to you or were you too busy shlepping around trying to convince them to vote for the “shvartze” with the Arab names? You think this strong animosity Russian Jews and other American immigrants from the Second and Third World have against Obama was grown in a vacuum? They’ve seen his type before. They ESCAPED his type. Europe, even Canada is headed to the right, but you lefty types who still hearken back to that dreadful day, nearly four years ago, couldn’t see past the grimace on your self-righteous faces when your candidate lost. You couldn’t moveon.org, you just made it your intention to embarrass, distrust, and fight George Bush and the Republicans on everything and now you are so giddy to punish them and get your vindication, that you’ve dropped as low as supporting the most arrogant, leftist radical socialist that not only won’t stand up to his own party, but would veer as far left as associating with an unrepentant, avowed Communist, enemy of the state, who tried to murder your fellow Americans that STILL wants the end of US “Imperialism”. Bravo. No wonder movies like “Recount” make it to HBO while “Path to 911” gets a symbolic congressional ban from the Democrats. I can’t wait to see what YOUR version of Free Speech is when your Messiah gets elected.

    And please, enough talking in hyperbole, it’s beginning to sound like a running inside joke with one of your other personalities.

  • Spam filter please:

    MUL:

    “Alex’s rich imagination provides a much more amusing sense of context for what he sees in everything: Terrorism, Anti-Americanism, Socialism, Anti-Americanism, Anti-Americanism. Perhaps he could look to you for guidance in schooling him on the finer points of seeing anti-neoconservatism in everything, instead. It’s a little narrower approach, but more coherent.”

    You native born Westerners are sure such naive folk. Didn’t you ever listen to what Bubba and Zeda ever said to you or were you too busy shlepping around trying to convince them to vote for the “shvartze” with the Arab names? You think this strong animosity Russian Jews and other American immigrants from the Second and Third World have against Obama was grown in a vacuum? They’ve seen his type before. They ESCAPED his type. Europe, even Canada is headed to the right, but you lefty types who still hearken back to that dreadful day, nearly four years ago, couldn’t see past the grimace on your self-righteous faces when your candidate lost. You couldn’t moveon.org, you just made it your intention to embarrass, distrust, and fight George Bush and the Republicans on everything and now you are so giddy to punish them and get your vindication, that you’ve dropped as low as supporting the most arrogant, leftist radical socialist that not only won’t stand up to his own party, but would veer as far left as associating with an unrepentant, avowed Communist, enemy of the state, who tried to murder your fellow Americans that STILL wants the end of US “Imperialism”. Bravo. No wonder movies like “Recount” make it to HBO while “Path to 911” gets a symbolic congressional ban from the Democrats. I can’t wait to see what YOUR version of Free Speech is when your Messiah gets elected.

    And please, enough talking in hyperbole, it’s beginning to sound like a running inside joke with one of your other personalities.

  • Oh Chutzpah. I was gonna write a post on the Conde Nast write up. There’s just only so many hours in a day, you know??

  • This is funny:

    “And please, enough talking in hyperbole, it’s beginning to sound like a running inside joke with one of your other personalities.”

    Alex, stop trying to compare what happens in America to what happened in countries like Canada, Russia, and in Europe. It’s not patriotic. You might not realize that we’re a different country, but my granparents do. So do Barry Goldwater’s grandchildren, Colin Powell, and Ben Bernanke (all Obama supporters). But they’re all just socialist lefty types, right?

    You’re not worth taking seriously at this point.

    Pretty soon this election campaign will be all over, Obama will likely win in a landslide (with considerable moderate, independent and conservative support, thank you very much), and you will still be too uppity to realize that this election had nothing to do with right vs. left and everything to do with competence and appealing to America’s better instincts versus incompetence and demagoguery of the worst sort – the bigoted fearmongering sort that you just stooped to.

    Bush and the Republicans is not my fight. That’s Chris Buckley’s, Kathleen Parker’s and George Will’s fight (read about the way the right wing has effectively fatwahed those who have so much as dared to question the Republican candidate’s decisions, his party’s policies and strategies, their pundits’ reactionary obsession with loyalty over any criticism whatsoever). You never realized that. Conservatives will likely have to spend a long time in the political wilderness after November trying to figure out where they went so wrong. If you want to have them as a viable alternative to vote for you will have to take all this up with them, not piss and moan with me while deluding yourself into thinking I’m the Bolshevik incarnate. You can throw every retarded label at me that you want to (and you’re dead-wrong on what I believe – you have no idea whatsoever), but in America we still get to vote. And your candidate’s losing. Very. Badly. And no one trusts George Bush or anyone having anything to do with him. So go ahead and make the majority of Americans into your enemy. Ridicule them. Project every irrational old-world fear you carry around with you onto them. We still vote in the morning.

    But if you ever want a viable candidate from the right to vote for again you might want to rethink your approach.

  • Alex, what if my great-grandparents were wise enough to have emigrated to America before the Europeans went through the, shall we say, more experimentive phase of their long-standing lunacy? Shouldn’t that count for something? I did inherit their genes, after all, as well as their apparent lack of any paranoia over Obama (or willingness to see Hitler/Stalin/Castro in him and in every political persuasion that’s not in lock-step with the crumbling remains of the Republican party).

  • Long-standing lunacy? Alright, being critical of Obama is racist just because. Ridiculing Europeans is intellectually superior just because. La lune est croissante.

  • Maybe it’s time for me to share Alex’s Concentric Circles of Care in case you think I care more about nationality than ideology when it comes to my concern for other humans. And yes, in case you are wondering, my religious ties are at least one ring closer to the middle than both of those. Imagine for instance where Michael Moore fits in. He’s practically inanimate, although people like Soros, Finklestein, Alinsky, and Chompsky have been excommunicated completely. In fact, they are so far off the map, they’re practically sharing space with Ahmedinejad.

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