If you're married, have fun!Yiddles can Diddle!

I enjoy taking the piss out of Rabbi Shmuley Botteach. The ground breaking former Lubavitch emissary and author of the book Kosher Sex and now regular columnist has often made statements that made me crazy. When he goes off about US foreign policy or Hashem help us, rock and roll music, it’s all I can do to stop myself from firing off an email missive that begins with “Dude. Shut the f*ck up, you have no clue what you’re talking about.”

But when the man sticks to what he knows, he’s golden, untouchable, a veritable beacon of wisdom in a world darkened by obfuscation and wooden, outmoded notions. I’m talking about steamy lingerie, dildos, adult toys, hot sex … and halacha . The Rabbi writes about all that and more in his latest column, titled Lust is Jewish. He says:

Anything that increases passion between husband and wife without compromising intimacy is a good thing … The really unholy thing is not sex toys but adultery, not a wife wearing lingerie but a husband staring at another woman’s naked body… The monotony of modern marriage is the real enemy we have to combat. Yes, sex was holy, but that didn’t mean it couldn’t be hot.

He goes on to chide Texas Law enforcement authorities who saw fit to arrest an otherwise fine, church going lady for holding tupperware-party style events where various sex toys were offered for sale to all female groups. This served to reinforce very fundamental differences between the Christian view of sex as opposed to the Jewish one. And uh… why Jews ought to vote Democrat. Heh…

Now granted, Boteach is very careful to place all this within the context of marriage – which is cool. How many of us know people involved in dull lifeless marriages? How many of us are actually currently involved in an unsatisfying relationship? The Rabbi’s message is that real, valuable intimacy requires hard work and effort. And yes, maybe even some props. But whatever, make the effort. It is so easy to covet and much harder to foster and maintain real intimacy. In this culture we’re all such junkies for ease of use and convenience, we forget that really GOOD things are difficult to come by. Oh and that if you’re Jewish, sex for the sake of pleasure is not automatically sinful (in the context of marriage, yo! Don’t get too excited).

This week, Rabbi Boteach is definitely Jewlicious.

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About the author

ck

Founder and Publisher of Jewlicious, David Abitbol lives in Jerusalem with his wife, newborn daughter and toddler son. Blogging as "ck" he's been blocked on twitter by the right and the left, so he's doing something right.

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