I could be king ...There is a difference, I suppose, between stupid people and people who merely do stupid things. Rabbis who call for instituting an Israeli monarchy and beseech God to cause the death of elected officials straddle the line between the two. Oddly, there is a group that is willing to do, well, both. The
Jerusalem Post reports on a ceremony at the Shiloah Spring in the east Jerusalem neighborhood of Silwan Tuesday night, involving some water and a reenactment of a ceremony from the ‘First Temple Period.’

The point of the reenactment? One leader, Rabbi Hillel Weiss, said:

This ceremony will lay the foundations for instituting a Jewish king, a Jewish court, and the Third Temple…We will draw inspiration and strength from the ceremony as the holy priests did in Temple times, and we will ensure that the Jewish people will not be removed from their land.

Israel’s monarchic past had a rather short lived record of success. Our first King, Saul, was a paranoid megalomaniac who employed a witch to put him in touch with the dead. While the following two luminaries (David and Solomon) managed to build a temple and expand our state’s borders, the former’s murderous lust prevented him from building the temple and the latter’s ploygamy, polytheism and decadence is blamed for the splitting of the Kingdom into two parts. Decline ensued.

Anyhow, the other leader of this fun-time-party-action group is none other than Mr. Death Curse himself, Rabbi Yosef Dayan. His plan for better Israeli government included the following inspirational words:

Sharon’s plan is insane and I wish for his death…We want a Jewish monarchy in Israel and not a secular government with secular political parties. The decisions made by the majority are not decisions since the majority is stupid.

Now that is just not nice. I always thought that all of Israel was a nation of brothers! I never imagined that Cain and Able was the right paradigm! In any case, despite my ridicule, I hereby announce my support for these Maniac’s Rabbi Weiss and Rabbi Dayan’s plan under one condition: that I be your King.

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  • I wouldn’t say it was “murderous lust” that prevented King David from completing the temple – it was simply that as a warrior King, he had blood on his hands. Jews are meant to be a peace loving people and the temple embodied this notion. Consequently no steel was to be used in its construction as steel was also used to make swords and other weapons and implements of war. It only made sense that a King, beloved by G*d as he was, who had distinguished himself on the battlefield, ought not be the one to complete the construction of the temple. Was King David lusty? Yeah, so we’re a lusty people too, nothing wrong with that ….

  • T_M wrote: “Grand Mufti?!”

    Not Grand Mufti – grandmuffti. Jewlicious’s latest poster has a great fondness for uh… muffins. Hence the nick. Yeah. Muffins. Loves ’em.

  • Well, David did indirectly murder Uriah the Hittite in order to get it on with the Uriah’s hot wife. Tsk Tsk. I guess that wasn’t what prevented him from building the temple, however.

  • First, I don’t mean the famous NOLA sammich called Muffuletta, I mean the moroccan pancake typically served with melted butter and honey during post-passover celebrations – also pronounced Moffletta.

    Second we’re not going to NOLA until Mardi Gras.

  • Pace CK, I in fact detest muffins. But I do like the song ‘the Muffin Man’ by Frank Zappa.

  • … and another thing, the Philosopher King has to NOT want to be King. I don’t think it’s enough that one is both a philosopher and a King.

    Now why does E want to leave?? Geez… a couple of holidays, one business trip to New York and everything falls apart??

  • I’m afraid it’s my fault, I expressed viewpoints he wasn’t expecting to find here.

    I feel bad, but then I realize that he wants me to feel bad…so kinda like you going to Nuweiba so the terrorists won’t win, I’m working hard not to feel bad about E’s departure. Not that he’s a terrorist or anything.

  • Rabbi Yosef Dayan is an honorable man and is from the
    lineage of King David. We all know that PM Sharon is
    making efforts to remove Jews from their land, to give
    up property they have owned for years. His command to
    tear down the shul in Tapuach has hurt my heart and
    I would welcome a King in Israel that would not be
    bribed by nations that bow to the oil mongering Arabs.
    It is apparent that the present government is not
    working toward the betterment of the Jewish people.

  • Re: I could be King…

    and you could be Queen…

    and we can be HEROES!

    Just for one day ….

    and we can be heeeeeeeeeroes,

    for ever and ever!

  • Judy, um, you didn’t happen to hear about the King David lineage from the rabbi himself, didja?

  • Angel, wrong blog, wrong, just wrong. Do not go swinging around terms like Italian pasta.