Why “Part One”? Because I’m sensin’ a series.
For some reason, I seem to get a lot of mail telling me why I’m not married. Sure, most of it is spam, urging me to check out “Chryztina and her hottt friends on their brand new webcam,” but sometimes, an email comes in that enlightens me in a whole new way.
Today’s email brought me this gospel: I’m too dang liberal. And I won’t date Republicans. And it’s not just me, it’s all Jewish women. No! In fact, it’s all single women.
Attention Single Jewish Women, the article’s title announces:
In fact, attention all single women who want to marry. Do you know why you wonderful ladies are still alone most nights? Because, in general today, the idea of dating a conservative, God forbid Republican male, is the equivalent of dating a chimpanzee!
As most men mature, they tend to depart from the secular college brainwash, based on 1960’s liberalism, and become somewhat more conservative. The macho caveman DNA starts to break down the indoctrinated feminization of the well educated male. Men are forced to go out into the real world to become corporate hunters, especially if they eventually plan to have a family.
Women are totally different, despite what elite college professors believe about the similar natures of men and women. As women get older they become more liberal, until they wed. Single men generally go towards the right, while single women head left; another one of God’s little tricks to make the mating process more complex.
Want proof? Me too! Let’s go to the experts in Jewish demographic data collection: JDate.
These results can be proven in real life by studying any of the most popular dating websites of the day; the present Jewish favorite being www.Jdate.com. With the exception of a majority of Orthodox women, virtually every woman’s political viewpoint in her “dating profile” is liberal or left.
Very interesting. So what are all poor, single female Democrats to do? Maybe we should just give into our natural reaction to being boyfriendlessness and resort to our standby mancatching techniques/comforts/indulgences: plastic surgery, expensive vacations, salon visits or shoe shopping.
So a little advice to all you single Jewish and non Jewish women who would like to get married. Forget the major cosmetic surgery, new hairstyle, Manolo Blahnik shoes, Club Med jaunts and new wardrobe. [Oh, crap. –EDK.] Just rethink your politics and world view, and perhaps a honeymoon will become a much greater possibility
“Perhaps”? “A much greater possibility”? You mean, all I have to do is change the way I think, and I’m not even guaranteed a honeymoon?? I think they call that “plausible deniability.” Or a “disclaimer.”