Bar Mitzvah!

This Thursday, Andrew Krucoff will finally be a man!
It was inevitable! As soon as we found out that Gawker Mascot Andrew Krucoff, sheigetz that he is, never had a Bar Mitzvah, well… we had to do something about it. And what could be more fitting than a Bar Mitzvah at the Kotel? So please join us this Thursday at 8 am at the Kotel for Andrew Krucoff’s entry into Jewish peoplehood. Afterwards, we will enjoy Arak and Sfenj sponsored by Dov Charney at American Apparel who never misses an opportunity to help out any member of the Gawker family seeking spiritual enlightenment. The Bar Mitzvah ceremony will be presided over by Rabbi Ezra (yes, that Rabbi Ezra) and ought to be visible on the Kotel Cam starting at 1 am EST. So please if you are in Jerusalem, come join us! Many Israel based bloggers are going to be there too! Bar Mitzvah presents may be sent to Andrew via the paypal link on his Web site, YoungIsraelite.

Mazel Tov!

About the author

ck

Founder and Publisher of Jewlicious, David Abitbol lives in Jerusalem with his wife, newborn daughter and toddler son. Blogging as "ck" he's been blocked on twitter by the right and the left, so he's doing something right.

33 Comments

  • I’ll be there. Bring a camera because it’s a rare occurance that I put on tefillin. I better get an aliyah. Or at least a Bar Mitzvah themed t-shirt.

  • For those of us of the female persuasion who will happen to be in Jerusalem tomorrow – what? I gotta go tippietoes over the mechitzah??

  • If you vote for Shinui in the next election maybe they’ll start providing step stools for the ladies at the Kotel.

  • Do you guys really know Dov Charney? I think I have a pretty bad crush on him just from what you’ve been saying about him on here. From what I gather he’s a jewish entrepenuer with a high sex drive and a taste for all things retro…sounds like my ultimate soulmate. Come on guys, I promise to give you the exclusive inside scoop to all the Chutzpahlicious details…

  • Personally, I would arrange a meeting with Chutzpah and Dov Charney in return for never having to be subjected again to any and all Chutzpahlicious details for as long as I draw breath.

  • none of the bars/pubs/clubs i have contacts are available on such short notice…anyone have a big space absent evil neighbors?

  • It’s a deal Michael. However, if he the CEO is able to fulfill my long sought after favorite fantasy I will have to shout it from the rooftops. I’ll spare you the gory details but let’s just say it involves the Barry White Greatest Hits CD and lots of hot fudge and whipped cream. It’s strange that I can’t seem to find a man who likes that combination. (Hope you don’t lose your lunch from that piece of excessive info., gave me a cheap thrill to share it.)

  • It’s a deal Michael! But if the CEO fulfills my long sought – after ultimate fantasy I am going to have to shout it from the rooftops. I’ll spare you the gory details but let’s just say it involves Barry White’s Greatest Hits CD.

  • chutzpah, just because a man likes to expose himself to unwilling participants does not, to me at least, imply that he has great sexual prowess. if the only requirement is that he be rich and super horny, ability to pleasure a woman notwithstanding, i wouldn’t think you’d have trouble finding your dream man. as for your fantasy of having a man who looked remarkably like a walrus sing intolerably cheesy songs whilst you get your freak on, to each his own.

  • Any Dude that can write a Bar Mitzvah Disco book while heading up his own major Union-Free Corporation is sounding very much like my kind of guy. As for unwilling participants, did they ever hear of turning around and walking out? But hey, I’m new to the Charney story, so I don’t have all the details yet and will reserve judgement until I meet him in person, hopefully in his private jet with some champagne and caviar…yeah…that works for me….

  • um, everywhere, melinda, including this very blog. initially it was reported by one miss Claudine Ko of Jane magazine. but i guess she was arguably a willing participant. anyway i’m not saying the guy’s a deviant or anything. he may be. all i was saying was that if that’s an example of his “high sex drive” it’s not a very appealing one, to me at least.

  • Apparently he exposes himself to willing people. All the difference in the world.

    Anyway, congrats to Mr. Krucoff and all the best wishes. Next time, if he wants to become a man, there is also another way…

  • This just in for the Krucoff Bar Mitzvah update: it’s running on Jewish Standard Time. Apparently because some mysterious foods are needed to officially complete the Jewish man-ification of Young Krucoff. So stay tuned, if y’all aren’t sleeping. Time will tell as to whether the next ten minutes will actually have me spectating or sleeping…but in any case, mazal tov.

  • The Barmitzvah was very moving! Right now we’re all kinda drunk, so we’ll post pics and shit later. Mobius also has a video. Links to follow.

    BTW Vodka and Arak do not mix. At all. Words to live by kiddies.

  • It was a very difficult morning. We should have downed the arak before the davening. The next person who asks me for tzedekah is going to get clocked in the face.

  • Smack!

    Could someone please call me and let me know what the deal is with this evening? Us Israelis of suburbia can’t just jump out of our apartments into a bar in downtown Jerusalem. We need to plan shit. Call me now bitches!

  • Could someone please call me and let me know what the deal is with this evening? Us Israelis of suburbia can’t just jump out of our apartments into a bar in downtown Jerusalem. We need to plan shit. Call me now bitches!

Leave a Comment