Today He is a Man!
This morning we celebrated Andrew Krucoff’s Bar Mitzvah, 11 years late mind you, but hey, better late than never! And no briss was required either, so that was good too. Anyhow, I’m still too drunk to be clever, so lets just get on with the play by play, ok? In this first photo to the right, we see Andrew in his Bar Mitzvah regalia, tallis and teffilin (oy such naches) posing with a copy of Bar Mitzvah Disco. I think Roger Bennett owes Andrew a gift copy of the book now, for his Bar Mitzvah present. You in Roger? The boy will be back in New York in a couple of weeks – I’ll hook you up. Have your people call my people. We’ll do the lunch thing. But I digress …

Here’s the Bar Mitzvah Boy and Rabbi Ezra carrying the Torah! Oy! Such naches we were shlepping! Apparently, Andrew is the only grandchild on his Mother’s side to have a Bar Mitzvah. Can we expect more Krucoff’s in Jerusalem?

Here’s Andrew tryin’ to front like he’s all chill and stuff. Really, he’s nervous as heck and attempting to avoid crying. A Bar Mitzvah is an important milestone in any boy’s life, and a Bar Mitzvah at the Kotel, adjacent to the temple mount, Judaism’s holiest site, well, that’s got to be a tad emotionally overwhelming. When Krucoff’s dad was 13, before 1967, Jews couldn’t even be here!

Aw… there’s Andrew reading his prayer! Laya in the ladies section threw candies at him. The Old ladies asked her who the Bar Mitzvah boy was – when she pointed to Krucoff, they were all “he’s 13 and has a beard already? What do you feed him?” Try to explain Lower East Side secular Jews to these people. not so easy …

Here are guests Harry and our Michael flashing gang hand signals. Probably in protest of former Crips leader Tookie’s execution in California. Or maybe they were trying to be funny. Ha ha.

Another dude reading our copy of Bar Mitzvah Disco. He looked perplexed. To say the least.

And now it’s time to celebrate! American Apparel and Dov Charney provided Vodka, Arak and pastries for everybody! Literally. A whole crew of Hassidic Jews suddenly appeared and helped themselves. But it’s all good. Food and Vodka bring people together and Dov Charney’s t-shirt fuelled largesse knows no bounds!

Reb Ezra and his star pupil enjoy a nice L’Chaim! Mazel Tov!

Yup. Dude’s totally hammered. Just like a real man!

Here’s the gang – from L to R, Harry from a View from Here, Michael finishing off the last of the Arak, Krucoff finishing off the Vodka, me, laya and Mobius from JewSchool. Funny Moby… Moby also made an awesome video of the event – check it out on Young Israelite featuring a soundtrack by 50 Shmekel. Hilarious! Party continues tonight at Kikar Tzion at 10:30 pm and at Midnight at Delia on 4 Shlom Tsiyon Hamalkah. be there or be square in the diasporah!

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About the author


Founder and Publisher of Jewlicious, David Abitbol lives in Jerusalem with his wife, newborn daughter and toddler son. Blogging as "ck" he's been blocked on twitter by the right and the left, so he's doing something right.

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