You know you are The Big Jew in The Family when your parents go on vacation and meet their friends from Russia in Spain, and they bring you back the following as a present:

Like Absolut. Only not as sexy. And with more pogroms per milliliter.

That would be “Jewish Standard Vodka, made on Matzah (how? why?) and Kosher.” By some mysterious named Kauffman, who chooses to remain in Roman letters. Let’s have a closer look:

"Yaakov, I'm so hosed." "Oy, Abram. How about another 50 gramulichik?"

I mean, I guess it’s not really anti-Semitism, but who knows what is going on with that dog there.  ASPCA better get on their asses.  Except there is no ASPCA in Russia.  Only stereotypes of shtetl Jews walking around and taking shots of Jewish Standard Vodka (Made on Matzha.)

For added effect, Russian in Hebrew!  Opa.

For added effect, Russian in Hebrew! Opa.

I guess it’s not so bad, considering some of the other caricatures we have to contend with, from the Russian store I visit and buy Russian groceries at regularly:

It says they’re from Israel!  That means they are not anti-Semitic. Probably just a campaign slur on Lieberman.  It would be totally damaging to his reputation to be pictured in a kipah. Are you sure it says “roasted sunflower seeds” and you weren’t going for “roasted Jews?” No Freudian slip this time?  These garinim seem a little racist to me.  On the other hand, Racist Garinim is a great name for a band.

Just checking, Russian illustrators, just checking.

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  • my papa told me that Jews are the biggest anti-Semites. He told me this while counting money and drinking the blood of Christian babies.

  • There is just no end to the weirdness Russians generate. Loud, mukti-colored Versace shirts are truly just the tip of the iceberg. Save me a pack of Greedy Jew brand roasted sunflower seeds!

  • Oh my, in Germany they don (fake) Dolce&Gabbana. 🙂

    Vicki, in a way this is too sad to be laughing but too funny to cry. Now I’m disturbed. 🙂

  • Hi Natalie,

    ich sehe Ihr seid aus Deutschland. Ich habe gerade mal auf Eure Seite geclickt. Die neuen Flaschen sind wirklich sehr originell und ansprechend. Wir bei Jewlicious sind gegenüber Kooperationen und möglichen Sponsoren 🙂 immer offen. Falls Interesse besteht, dann meldet Euch bitte entweder hier oder über die Kontaktseite.

    Lieben Gruß,

  • Thanks for extending the invite, froylein. We may have to investigate further. This is getting curiouser.

  • Vicki, think we need to sample to make sure it’s not fake Russian? I’ll bring the shashlik and the carrot salad.

  • Da. 🙂 I’ll gladly tell the Russian joke about the hedgehog that has learnt to breathe through its anus to entertain the audience. 🙂

  • just got this as a gift. trying to figure out if this could be kosher for passover. probably not. in all likely hood will sample this shabbos. lchaim.