Jewlicious

Dating in Los Angeles vs. Tel Aviv

10 years ago
2 Comments
by Dr. Mishmish
114 Views

PRE-DATE

Los Angeles Guys: Hi there!
Tel Aviv Guys: Az ma cacha v’zeh?

 

 388922_2756236228147_497437147_n
Los Angeles Guys: Why don’t we talk this week and see what your schedule is like.
Tel Aviv Guys: Here’s my phone, put in your number.

 

Los Angeles Guys: I’d love to take you out on a date.
Tel Aviv Guys: Wanna meet up for drinks?

 

Los Angeles Guys:Great, I will pick you up at 8.
Tel Aviv Guys: Sababa meet me at the bar at 11.

Los Angeles Guys: (8 pm text) I’m outside!
Tel Aviv Guys: (11:15 text) Running late.

 

images

 

 

 

 

 

 

THE DATE

Los Angeles Guys: I brought you this rose, I hope you like it.
Tel Aviv Guys: I bought cigarettes for myself and bamba for you. If you don’t like bamba you’re not Israeli enough.

Los Angeles Guys: You like my shoes? Thanks! I got them at the Beverly Center.
Tel Aviv Guys: What do you mean you don’t like my flip flops?!

Los Angeles Guys: What would you like to eat?
Tel Aviv  Guys: The eggplant at this bar is the BEST try it. Try it. It’s the BEST.

 

Los Angeles Guys: No no don’t even try to pay – I would love to treat you.
Tel Aviv Guys: I got it this time, but don’t worry, next time on you!

 

Los Angeles Guys: So tell me more about yourself, you sound fascinating.
Tel Aviv Guys: So let me tell you about how I was a pilot in the army and work in the Shabak.

 

tumblr_mlb5xtbSv41ql5yr7o1_500

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

POST-DATE

Los Angeles Guys: You looked so beautiful last night.
Tel Aviv Guys: Why why why the things I wanted to do to you last night!

Los Angeles Guys: Here’s a small gift for you. I saw it and thought of you and just had to buy it.
Tel Aviv Guys: Here’s a funny video for you. If you don’t laugh you’re not Israeli enough.

Los Angeles Guys: Next time, why don’t you come over so I can cook dinner for us.
Tel Aviv Guys: Yalla enough games, come over for vodka-redbull.

Los Angeles Guys: Do you need directions to my house?
Tel Aviv Guys: Go alllllll the time straight. Then at the felafel stand, turn right.

Los Angeles Guys: Don’t feel any pressure. We will only do what you want to do
Tel Aviv Guys: Don’t be so cheap! Flow with me, baby!

 

In conclusion, no man is perfect, no city is perfect, no date is perfect…but get over it – if he means what he says and says what he means, it’s a good start!

blog-2

(Re-post from an article I wrote that was published here)
Dr. Mishmish
Latest posts by Dr. Mishmish (see all)

You may also like

About the author

Dr. Mishmish

MBA, MA. Have more fun. Worry less. Laugh more. Be good to yourselves & others. Grow, learn, and develop.

The greatest risk in life is not taking one.

View all posts

2 Comments

  • Hahaha next article use more stereotypes on Israeli guys. the ones that you use was not enough…
    On one thing you’ve got it right
    In Israel we don’t speak one form the heart and one form the mind