Jewlicious

So the new background girl

19 years ago
110 Comments
by themiddle
100 Views
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Hot DiggityI like the redesign in general, but what is going on with that cloud? Is that like YHWH leading the Israelites through the desert? It seems to be cutting red-girl’s body off in a way that seems unbalanced. Otherwise, it’s fresh and clean.

On the other hand, the site is now running like mollasses.

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themiddle

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110 Comments

  • Hi. This is Prophet CK from the Temple of the Ephemeral Jews. Clearly even the Reform movement is too elitist about who it decides to allow into the exclusive private club of organised Jewry. Have they not heard the entreaties of leaders like Edgar Bronfman? Do they not care about continuity? That’s why at ck’s Temple of the Ephemeral Jews we believe in retroactive, unsolicited conversion. Hence you may note that we have already declared all of Finland to be Jewish. Similarly, in the hopes of ending the acrimony shown here, I now declare all red headed women to be Jewish.

    *snap*

    It’s done. Kathleen, who will now be known as Chaya Mushka, is Jewish and the ranks of the Jewish people have thus been significantly expanded. Heh… what Jewish continuity problem?

    All hail the Prophet ck. I officiate at Bar/Bat Mitzvahs and weddings too.

  • moshekappoya’s comment is a fairly funny attempt to make us all laugh, folks. What’s with the serious answers?

    Besides, would it be so bad if we were 98% kosher?

    Laya, you need to brush up on Reform. The parent has to be Jewish. Where they differ from you is that they would accept a Jewish father as sufficient for inclusion in the Jewish people. Makes sense to me.

  • Having a Jewish step-parent doesn’t make someone Jewish in the Reform movement. Having A Jewish parent (mother or father) and being raised as a Jew makes a person Jewish in the reform movement. Perhaps if the step-parent adopted the person at a very, very young age and she was raised as a Jew…

    Hypothetically–a person with a Jewish mother who was raised Catholic (the hypothetical father’s religion) might not be considered Jewish by the Reform Movement.

  • well, Kathleen happens to have a jewish step father, and happens to really like Jews, so according to Bronfman, possibly the reform movement, and certainly ck’s temple of the ephemeral Jews, she’s probably jewish anyway.

    Besides, at least she’s not wearing a cross like Romy was, and no body said boo about that.

  • Moshekappoya: quite the opposite, it’s a great honor and good deed for the goyim to love HaShem and glorify his name by abiding by the Noachide Laws.

  • moshekappoya: she’s not a spokes-model. she doesn’t speak or represent jewlicious in any capacity at all. she’s just someone who modelled our shirt. how does that ridicule Jews, like myself, who love hashem? and is there any halachah that says that non-jews can’t love hashem? why am i even responding to this shtuss????

  • Yes. By perhaps implying that gentiles can love Hashem, we are ridiculing Jews that love Hashem. Because that makes some sort of logical sense.

  • Everything has a reason
    I find it offensive that you have a shiksa wearing “I (heart) Hashem”. Are you trying to ridicule Jews that love Hashem???
    You can use any spokes-model you want, but if you stick with Kathleen, get rid of the “100% Kosher” sign.

  • You could make a jewlicious calendar 🙂 .. But yeah, no kvetching from me. Props to Romy and Kathleen for not freaking out that so many ppl are talking about them.

  • Oh fer chrissakes N. I’ll post another pic of romy for ya, and promise you there’s more to come, but please… enough with the whining.

  • Lets accept neither Romy nor Kathleen. Lets get a GENUINE JEWISH GIRL-HOTTY to pose.

    Lets make a new category named ‘Goylicious’, and therein post Romy and Kathleen.

  • at least the old girl had a non-denominational name like Romy. Kathleen just makes me think the is wearing a cross under that shirt. not that i’f be looking under the shirt.

  • Everybody knows that I’m the biggest Jewlicious fan, like, ever, but…

    What’s the problem with posting a picture of one of our hotty Jewish girlies? Why the need for the Irish shiksa?

  • why dont you all exchange emails? how did the topic go from picking a poster girl to girls reuniting chat?

  • Not to worry, LSAB, the same thing happened last year. We just don’t go after votes the way some of the other sites do. For example, right now I should be putting up some pithy and compelling post punctuated by an image of a Jewlicious beauty so that people would see how great we are and vote for us. Instead, I’m about to go have a tea and make a living so I can feed my family. So what if we don’t win any awards, I get to post on the same blog as a guy who walks around Jerusalem wearing a christ-killer ™ t-shirt and who has dated at least 4 Canadian redheads.

  • CK: you know the whole mtl jewish geography…. heard you started a site, googled,found it, checked it out. then I read your blog about dating JRHW and I couldnt NOT say anything. I friggin killed myself laughing at your Hot Frum blog and comments from The Dad, sounds like classic ck story, ay?
    sorry- find it hard to believe you are working on the marriage thing- is that part of the master plan for you? and when did you move to Jerusalem? you still running your web design co?
    btw, do you still hear from ackerman and Bridgitte?
    glad y’all find this sweet :)… middle you got my votes though looks like you need a bit more help than me 🙁

  • LSAB: Nope, not hard keeping track. Jewish red heads have been indellibly seared in my consciousness. I just didn’t want to come off looking like I had some kind of bizarre fetish. Who’da thunk one of you was reading my blog??? I mean we were like forever ago! So congrats again on the marriage and the kid. Keep reading jewlicious and stop sneaking up on me like that. How did you even find me??? I’m in Jerusalem. Still not married but working on it. Unfortunately, most of the red heads I’ve seen here, with a few notable exceptions, live in Meah Shearim and are usually married by the age of 18. Dang yo, that’s harsh.

    Yes middle. Sooo sweet.

  • ck: yup, you got the right one this time… nothing like a blast from the past to keep you on your toes. sounds like you had a thing for Jewish RHW….must be hard to keep track of all of us 🙂
    I am “friggin” married… and have a 1 year old daughter Hailey who rocks my world.

    et toi, mon ami?

  • LSAB, now that you’ve rediscovered your old flame, would you be kind enough to vote for us at the blogging awards. We seem to be falling behind a little and at least two of us are AWOL, I’m too busy to do anything about it and ck doesn’t care whether we win or lose. Your vote would be appreciated. 😉

  • LSAB: Uh… holy crap. I need to revise my numbers now. Yes indeed, there were more than 2 – there were in fact 4 fully Jewish red heads. Go figure. I should increase my consumption of vitamin B12 or something. I had no idea you read this blog! Are you still in Vancouver? Do you remember Adam? The guy that went on the balloon ride? He posts here as grand muffti. No fair sneaking up on me like that. By the way, are you friggin married?? If so, belated Mazel Tov … Geez, I hope I have the right person.

  • C’mon, CK, please, bring the old one back. This one’s head is too large for that body and feels weird.

  • LSAB: I dated a red head from… Calgary?? I don’t really know you, do I?

    G*d I hate it when this happens …

  • maybe i was hallucinating but i thought i just saw ol’ Romy gracing the home page

  • LMS, who *wouldn’t* be considered a Jew by Reform standards? They’d even accept the Pope!

    I honestly can’t believe that of all the women in the world, you couldn’t find a hot Jewess to pose for you. I’ve been to Israel, and there are the most breathtakingly stunning women there than I have ever seen in my entire life. You can’t even turn a corner without running into someone with supermodel potential. Hell, half of those hotties are carrying machine guns, which makes them even hotter!

    Speaking of hotties with weaponry, surely you can find some cute Sephardic IDF guys to post for us ladies . . . please?

  • i still like the old shirt better.
    also “david” responded to an email i sent a few weeks ago inquiring about the jewlicious girl. he said romy would be considered jewish by reform standards.

  • Last Man: Kathleen is wearing a very funky bracelet that she made herself. Also, Romy, the previous woman, does not have a Jewish anything – just a distant cousin who is a Russian Jew. Kathleen has a Jewish step father.
    Judi: Kathleen may be cute, but she sure as heck aint diminutive.

    Also I’ve dated 2 100% Jewish women with the reddest hair ever. Judaism is not a race people. Don’t make assumptions. Kathleen is only here to model the shirt. As a former model for Lancome I think she did a bang up job. Her religious background is really immaterial.

  • Ofri, it’s about girl power, it’s a whole thought movement. That and it sells. But your’e right, they should have men up there, kids, places to visit, whatnot. These people are marketing geniuses, you will yet see that I am right.

  • what does the new girl have on her arm?
    while the page is loading, you can catch a glimpse of something funky on her arm.
    bring back Romy with the jewish father!

  • 1. The Irish and the Jews are the only two “ethnic” (for lack of a better word) populations with naturally-ocurring red hair. Coincidence?

    2. Great. Another cute, diminutive chick. How about something for the girls?

    3. And as for the site being up to its traditionally high standards, I’m going to assume that Kathleen is a vegetarian, so that there are no kashrut issues 😉

  • Well for those who want the original Jewlicious girl back, you could also randomise the image. So you could then rotate Kathleen with Ronmy.

    Anyway, this looks like one of your most popular postings 🙂

  • I dunno who N is, but he must have some sort of wacky power, because brunette girl is back.

  • Please bring the other one back. This place is not the same without her.

  • why aren’t laya, esther & alli posed as the official “jewlicious girl?” in fact, why not write a script that randomly switches-out the 3 of them upon refreshing your browser?

  • “Everything has meaning, everything has a reason.”

    And with every choice, we keep waiting for the big reveal. And although we may never fully understand what’s actually going on, we know there’s something bigger. It gets frustrating, but we keep tuning in.

    Just like every detail on every episode of Lost.

  • Here’s the scoop, just for the record. The first woman, Romy, was a member of the teen girl squad – a group of ne’er do wells that hung out at my office. We hired her to take some shots. Romy is so not Jewish – at least that’s what I thought until I met her cousin, a Russian Jew. How whacked! And yet somehow… appropriate. Laya met Kathleen on the street. Kathleen was selling Jewelry and was from Halifax. She was somewhat of a character and we thoought she looked cool so we asked her to take some shots. When we told her what it was for she excitedly pulled out a book she was reading – an interesting work by an Orthodox Rabbi. We discussed it for a bit and, what can I say? It was a remarkable experience. Given that, I felt it was appropriate to put Kathleen up on the site. If you know me, you’ll know that I rarely ever do anything gratuitously. Everything has meaning, everything has a reason.

  • if anyone can give a legitimate reason for actually needing a hot girl on the top right corner of the page, then you can start debating the importance of her being a Jew or not a Jew. until then, let’s just call it what it is. it’s a pretty girl looking pretty. so what does it matter what her heritage is? who even says the last girl was Jewish?

  • I prefer the old look, this is just another sexy girl like all the many others we see pasted on billboards/magazines etc everywhere. how passe… Jewlicious now looks like any other website., on the other hand, the other girl was an individual, and made Jewlicious look more unique.

  • Are you sure she isn’t photoshopped?
    Her head is amazingly big, compared to the rest of her body.

  • It is also possible she converted. I for one am a blue eyed Jew with stick straight brown hair.

  • I like the new girl. She seems nice enough.
    And the Moorish, though distinctly Jewish, background is a little loud, maybe toning the colors down a bit. It’s just a little too much contrast.

  • with a name like kathleen, it’s pretty clear that this girl isn’t so kosher. that’s a shame, because there isn’t enough jewish soft core out there (aside from jdate). as a catholic who absolutely loves jewish women (the dark sensuality, the smoldering intellectualism, the tits), i say let’s see more hot jewish broads. at the same time, let’s see less of this “shiksa/shikse/sheketz” talk. we all know what it means, and it’s not nice.

  • If you are going to use this “shiksa” to be your muse and wear an “I love Hashem” shirt, can you still say this site is 100% kosher?

  • It’s a big improvement and not running any slower than before over here. In all fairness, we still need a pic of the Hot IDF MALE trooper to either alternate with shiksa babe or go under her coming out of his on little cloud.

  • ck:
    Why would the Jewschool RSS feed slow down the site? You can cache a copy on the Jewlicious web server, and have a script pull a fresh copy every few minutes, say, every 5 minutes. Then, you’ll just need to fetch it from the Jewlicious web server.

  • I’m NOT BACK! I’m dead.
    And…um…character??????
    Surely you jest!

  • Jsirp, I’m glad you’re back. Your character – I hope it’s just a role you play – is insane, but does makes me laugh.

  • I’m with LMS and the other folks who like the old picture. There really is a certain je-ne-sais-quoi about it that makes seem extremely appealing and appropriate for this site. I think I would actually miss the the old graphic if it were replaced. Even her t-shirt is better. I hope that design will be available too. Hey, if punksofzion can sell a line of t-shirts, why not jewlicious?

  • I like the Jewish ME-themed kitchen tile background. But the new girl doesn’t do it for me (but, then, neither did the last one).

    Can you get a Rachel Weisz look-alike to model the tee? That would be nice.

  • See? Jsirp gets garbage from “I take myself way too seriously and my name is laya and I’m thin so there!” Man! You’d think people would say YOU’RE BACK…BARUCH MECHAYEI MEISIM!!!

    But no. Well, that’s why jsirp is dead.

  • however, i still cant beleive you cant find an authentic jewish girl to pose. ok, maybe laya and the other jewlicious board members would qualify, but their has got to be someone. i have dated many jewish girls during my dating career, and can think of many who may pit the pose.
    thinking… maybe not. you know maybe we should just stick with the shiksas

  • i vote for the old picture. there was just something about her that moved you. the freckle near her lower lip, wearing pearls with her t-shirt, and that convincing look of prayer.

  • Jewlicious has a muse? Muffti thought we just had a cheerleader!

  • Where can we go to order the “I Hash ’em” shirts? 😉

    And I, for one, would vote that there’s something contradictory about having a non-Jewish beauty being the ‘muse’ (oy, a Hellenist term!) of Jewlicious. I don’t care if she’s blond-haired and blue-eyed, but could she at least have a nefesh yehudi?

  • I love this girl (shiksa?)!
    Her hair takes on lovely shapes like Boticelli’s famous painting of Venus, and the halo only adds to the effect.

    The contrast with the, uh, Sephardic background pattern is snappy and fresh.

    I have never liked the way the white text areas and sidebars just lay there on your colored/patterned backgrounds – and you haven’t addressed that with this redesign. Oh well.

  • jsirp – so not cool. You need to stop with the sexualized projections of anyone who’s not a nice plump neurotic jewish girl. It’s insulting and it’s beginning to sound like you are trying really hard to convince yourself why you didn’t end up with a hot shiksa like Kathleen above.

  • I agree. Not all Jewish girls look like “Jewish girls”. Some of us are skinny with light hair and freckles *ahem*. And our (Jewish) mothers often have dark skin, eyes, and hair! Shit happens… we can’t all look the same.

  • I miss the old girl.

    But I’m excited by the thought of possibly owning an “I (heart) Hashem” T-Shirt.

  • I may use the time it takes for the site to load to google where exactly this Has Ham town is located.

  • 😆

    I have known a couple of very Jewish women who look like our new muse, Jsirp.

    ck, nobody wants you to lose any income if it helps with the bandwidth costs. There must be other companies providing banner ads that will allow the site to refresh faster.

  • Get the other chick’s sister!!!! I know that the first girl got an infection from the lip ring and that all those snap bands mean she was giving MAJOR ORAL to like, everyone, and that’s why she had to go away….but

    But – she’s got to have a hot sister, 2 years younger…bigger, better, hotter…come on, dudes. This chick’s MOTHER IS NOT JEWISH!!!!!

    Can’t you tell the difference. Not an ounce of neurotic tendencies in her. You think she’s got time for Chutzpah’s rants…or GETS ESTHER’S urban angst?????

    No way. This chick – she’s just a dumb yog (sorry tom)…..

    And you know what??? – there ain’t no depth to her…like, if you DO DECIDE TO BE CARNAL with her, and of course, if you’re tall she will, but she won’t get your jokes and when you touch her it will feel cold somehow…like hey, where did the person go????

    Jsirp says: LOSE THIS CHICK AND GET US A HOT, SLIGHTLY OVERWEIGHT, COMPLAINING, WHINING, IRRESISTABLE, UNSTABLE, SEARCHING, YEARNING JEWISH CHICK FOR THIS SITE!!!

    Jsirp, zt”l over and out

    p.s. Why do blogs and bloggers take themselves so freaking seriously? Renagade Rebbetzin is soooooooooooooooo boring already!

  • Mollasses. Hmmm. Well it has little or nothing to do with the redesign. Jewlicious is an extremely busy site and the traffic puts incredible stress on our otherwise hardy servers. The page also makes calls to external services – these slow the page load a lot. Consequently, I may have to eliminate the rss feed to Jewschool or put it on a separate page. Our banner ads may have to be eliminated as well. All just to make y’all happy. Oy.

  • to everyone who wants to know about the I Heart Hashem shirt – We will soon be switching printers and the shirt will be available once again. Stay tuned, we’ll make an announcement when we do…

  • at 1024 x 768 resolution, I have to scroll horizontally. any way to fix that?

  • I prefer the “Old” background girl… her youthfulness and look of reverance for Hashem was SO refreshing.

  • try refreshing your browser and maybe the new background and spokesmodel will show up. After enjoying your icecream that is. 🙂

  • I feel left behind and confused as well, I also have the old Jewlicious lady and background. I second the call for confusion soothing ice cream.

  • oh, wow.
    i like this new girl so much better than the old one.
    so, so much.
    the wallpaper is a little more distracting, but whateva.

  • I’m so confused. Jewlicious looks the same to me as it has for months. The I Love Hashem girl has been there for months and the strange cloud she sits on. Did I have a super secret Jewlicious on my computer that nobody else could see? Is my internet psychic?

    So confused… must go have… ice cream.

  • Another thing it does your site that I have neve seen for many years, if you go into one thread, then you want to return to the main page, it gets stuck sometimes and just won’t reload. even then when you retype wwww.jewlicious.com, it takes forever and a day.

    I think that you may also have specific issues w/ browsers. I believe that I can assist you coding -wise, please contact to discuss. rates are very flex.

  • The girl’s name is Kathleen. I met her while she was selling necklaces she made from beer bottles on the strees of Montreal. She was kind enough to do a few shots with us, and we figured what the hell, time for a change.

  • It’s always been slow this web site. I have hardly ever seen a web site this slow to load.

    Sometimes it is OK for awhile but then back to crap. Often times, it won’t even load. This is from high speed lines also.

    It is a good idea to change the pictures. Where is she selling these necklaces, I am often in Montreal myself.
    Peace,
    Jobber

  • for a website that prides itself on gratuitous boobies I’d expect a more shapely background girl. no offense of course.

  • I think she looks like a 2006 version of Barbara Eden as Jeannie from the 1960’s show “I Dream of Jeannie”. with the cloud floating, the tile floor motif and all. I guess that is the effect of moving ck to the Middle East, he is getting in touch with his mystical Moroccan roots and all.

  • I love the coloring and the design of the new background, but you know your going to hell right? 🙂 Just checking …

  • So who is the girl advertising the I Love Hashem tee? Maybe another one for Suicide Girls?
    And are those tees for sale?