I’m getting a little tired of all these activities in Israel which I can’t attend anyway because I’m too old. Birthright, ROI120, and now Livnot for people who have 6-12 months to spare. And let’s face it, Jewlicious at the Beach just ain’t very formal. But the Bush family has given us an answer and I’d like to propose the Jewlicious White Tie Dinner.

Imagine Jewlicious at the Beach for older, established members of the Tribe. We’d invite the usual suspects: Bronfman, Steinhardt, Schusterman, Lauder, etc. We’d have informative sessions about ancient Israel and the history of the Six Day War. We’d entertain with Rav Shmuel Itzhak Perlman and maybe Streisand would be willing to join us for a song or two. Speakers would include mega-successes like Michael Dell and Michael Eisner. Spielberg’s younger kids would be running around with the nanny. We’d clobber those foolish enough to try in pick-up basketball. Then Dinner would follow, of course, and would include the obligatory hummus, but we’d also include some other fare appropriate to the occasion such as ck mother’s chakchouka. Best of all, we’d get to see Muffti, ck, Michael and TheMiddle shaven, in suits and ties, and our fine female contributors such as Esther, Phoebe and Beth in exquisite dresses (I hear Ralph Lauren and Calvin Klein would love to compete for the honor of providing the outfits). Ah yes, the wine will be fine, the guests will smell nice, the food will be authentic and the music will be to die for. President Bush and Queen Elizabeth, eat your hearts out.

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