Cheers from the place CK and Muffti never manage to be in when I am. *audible sigh*

Here’s a little gem from my current trip:

I was unsuspectingly [I hope that’s a proper English word] strolling around the shoe department of one of my favourite NYC department stores, when I saw that Pandora’s boxed had opened almost stumbled over a pram that had been parked by the resident-baby’s obviously Chasidishe mother right in the narrow path between one of those sit-here-to-try-your-shoes-on-couches [I hereby declare this to be a proper English word] and the opposite wall.

Now, a few things about that situation irked me:
a) Said mother wasn’t trying on shoes. She was simultaneously chatting away on the phone (in so-so Yiddish) and with a friend seated next to her about the items she was planning on buying. The place was packed, and there were quite a few ladies balancing on one leg while trying to put on their objects of shoe-desire [make that another proper English word].
b) Every person passing from ladies’ dress shoes to ladies’ boots had to either tiptoe, firmly pressed against the wall, to avoid bumping into the pram (don’t start arguing with me about the necessity of taking a caravan-sized pram to a store; I grew up in big enough a family to know that there’s a pram for every need and situation – my father even invented the pram for siblings of different ages, figure that) or
c) bump into said pram, baby inside.

The above situation was too familiar to drive additional blood up my cheeks. I felt a little embarrassed though. Lately, the word “Fremdschaemen” has become widely used in Germany. It describes a situation in which a person you are or feel in some way connected to acts in a way embarrassing to them (which does not by any means mean that they view their behaviour to be a source of embarrassment) but you also feel embarrassed because of abovementioned connection.

What really made me blush though was that a little later, after my unsuccessful quest for boots (was successful today, no worries; this blogger is shoelicious) on my way out, said mother was changing her baby’s nappies on the sit-here-to-try-your-shoes-on-couch. In public. Without a blanket, a towel, or a changing bag underneath. I’m not prude, afterall I’m an average European, but even the most alternative, tree-hugging, progressively-under-water-baby-bearing mothers I know back home possess the tact not to change their babies’ nappies in public, let alone on a public settee. Urgh. (And yes, there is a restroom.)

Apart from that, I met the lovely Chutzpah (she really is a gem), and a few more folks from this extensive mishpoche.

CK hasn’t picked up the phone or replied to my emails since I got here, so I hope he is well. (Ends justifying the means, blah, blah…)

Hope you’re all staying safe wherever you may be located. And don’t change your babies’ nappies in public. Some therapists will later make a good living of having to treat your kid for nightmares about being in the nude and getting stared at by complete strangers.

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froylein

15 Comments

  • heh. Sorry about that F’lein but you decided to come after Muffti had just left and the poor boy works for a living and lives in California. Notice the symmetry – you never manage to be where Muffti and CK are…

  • Bump into the pram. Smile your sweetest smile, and say “Sorry!” chirpily – but with the brisk tone of voice of saying “excuse me!” instead of a real “Sorry”.

    Repeat as necessary.

  • Bump into the pram. mile your sweetest smile, and say “Sorry!” then wave a piece of geffilte fish with left hand towards opposite direction. With right hand replace live baby with doll and quickly slip live baby into back pack. Exit store and sell live baby on ebay to childless couple for lots of money. Go to Manolo Blahnik store where no one ever shops with a pram and buy sexy awesome shoes.

    Repeat as necessary. Manolo Blahni may be replaced with Prada or Jimmy Choo.

  • Hopefully that young mother didn’t change the next diaper on the table or bench in the Kosher Pizza Place after shopping!

  • This is OT, froylein, but my father and I are having a disagreement about saurbraten. I assume he is correct, but here is the issue:

    He remembers his mother’s saurbraten as a roast done in the oven and served with gravy. What I remember eating as a child was braised in liquid like a potroast. (Perhaps what I remember eating wasn’t saurbraten at all but something else.) However, the recipes I have seen all call for braising, using the marinade as the base for the gravy.

    Also, do you have a good recipe for potato dumplings (kartoffelkloesse)? I cannot prevent them from falling apart when I boil them, and if I add enough flour to hold them together, it’s like trying to eat vaguely potato-flavored golf balls. Awful. Is the trick perhaps to simmer them gently rather than boiling them at a high boil?

  • Muffti is supposed to apologize, not philosophize. 🙂

    BD, CK, next time I’ll take you gtuys with me.

    Chutzpah, I hope / bet she didn’t change it on the place we went to. 🙂

    Heh, Ephraim, what your father probably remembers is one of the initial steps of making Sauerbraten. After marinating the beef (approx. 4 days; “original” types that used the meat of old oxen and horses even were marinated for up to ten days – the origin of the dish), you rinse it, dry it, then fry it on all sides in the casserole or whatever you use for such simmered Braten. Then you add veggies / almonds and raisins (the Rhenish variety; I also like the one from Thuringia with cherries, but those get added later), fry a bit more, add about two cups of the (sifted) marinade and put into the oven to simmer. The frying process is done to give t5he Braten a bit of a distinctive crust and colour, plus it won’t get soggy that way.

    As for the Kartoffelkloesse, indeed, the water should only boil when you put the Kloesse into it. Then switch to low heat. The Kloesse are done when they’re swimming on the surface of the water. Alternatively, try a Bohemian variety: shape the Kloss dough into two or three large rolls (cylindrical), put each into a heat proof freezing bag and simmer in the water. Cut the rolls into slices for serving. (In Bohemia, they use special linen / cotton bags for making those dumplings, but the heat proof freezing bags work just fine, even when you put the dough directly into the bags and then shape it a bit – no messy fingers). Scoop the Kloss dough with two teaspoons into the slightly boiling water to make gnocchi (those are great as an alternative to pasta in a salad with strinngbeans, cherry tomatoes and garlic; be careful not to overboil the gnocchi as they will soak up some of the dressing).

    1.25kg potatoes (those that turn soft during boiling)
    salt
    1 egg
    65gr wheat flour

    Hope that helps.

  • Kortoffelkneidel rules! I usually prepare them halavi with a spicy feta/petrusilia filling, with deep-fried mushrooms and home-made Matbucha. Will be one of the first things I will cook after I come home from south b’ezrat hashem.
    There is nothing wrong with DCIP (diaper change in public) as long as you don’t do it in a crowded place or next to people who want to eat.

  • OK, that makes sense. I always brown the braten first before braising it. I don’t remember any almonds/raisins or cherries; I guess it’s a regional thing. My father’s mother’s father was from Flonheim, if that helps.

    I thought that was what was wrong with the kartoffelkloesse. The recipe you give is pretty much the standard I have seen everywhere, except the ones I remember always were flavored with nutmeg.

  • Abu, the problem (apart from the fecal matter, which, as I once read, already has a higher circulation rate in heimishe neighbourhoods due to sleazy handwishing habits causing higher illness rates at that; DK might have the source somewhere) is the low level of consideration that lady displayed; she could have gone to the restroom, where there are changing tables for babies.

    Ephraim, I skip on the nutmeg here as it can get bitter during boiling. I mix it under my mash4ed potatoes before serving though.

    If I hit the lottery, I’ll share with Muffti as promised. Or donate a tenure position for him at a university of his choice.

  • Froylein/Ephraim:

    1) What cut of meat do you use? Since moving to Israel I had to re-learn the beef cuts, as it is different from America.

    2) Fro – in English the word “sifted” usually is used just for dry ingredients. I would say “strained” or “sieved” for the marinade.

  • BD, thanks for the heads-up. I was wondering what word to use. 🙂

    In Germany, you just get a “Braten” at the butrcher’s. It’s usually neck or shoulder or hip (some people go for loin, but I reserve that kink for the human species). You can also pre-order a readily marinated sauerbraten at most butchers’. Lately, I’ve seen turkey roasts offered as an alternative, which I suppose might be easier getting hands on in Israel.

  • Must have been a pretty worthless trip if this was all that is blog worthy.

    What about the goyishe mama who whips our her breast and feeds her baby on a public bench? Where is that blog?

  • BD:

    My father says his mother used what is called in the US the “eye of the round”. Sounds to me like a pretty expensive cut to use for something like this.

    Since a saurbraten is, essentially, pickled, it seems to me that it would be best to use the most flavorful cut you could get. These cuts have a tendency to be tougher, but since the marinading is partially to tenderize the meat, and the slow braising tenderizes it even further, I don’t think you need to start out with a particulalry tender cut. Once the braten is done, you can cut it with a fork.

  • LoBiCh, sure you want to know everything I’ve done on this trip? That might make you blush.

    BTW, breastfeeding in public is not uncommon in Europe; many mothers still prefer a remote place though to have some quiet.

    Ephraim, true that. A good Saurbraten gets so tender from marinading that it melts in your mouth.