I believe Sde Boker, the kibbutz that was home to David Ben Gurion, is likely to see a significant rise in tourism shortly. Ynet (Yediot Aharonot’s website) reports that Ben Gurion’s gravesite is a popular destination for losing one’s virginity.

It appears his grandson, Yariv Ben Eliezer, approves:

“If the information is true, I think it’s great. I’m happy that years after my grandfather died, he continues to inspire our youth and still gives the country an erection.”

“But I wouldn’t have thought a cold, hard stone was the best place to have sex,” he said.

No, perhaps David and Paula Ben Gurion’s old bed might be a better place. Or their kitchen table. Maybe his old study with the musty books?

“Come tourists, we invite you to have erections at the home of Israel’s founding father.” I’m confident this is one way to bring out visitors down to the Negev. To generate additional revenues, they can sell Ben Gurion condoms and Paula Lubricants, not to mention a Lion of Zion Vibrator (tip shaped like a star of David).

It also wouldn’t hurt to have a sex therapist on hand, cuz these people need one.

And yes, David Ben Gurion foresaw this. Kind of.

The Mission
“… Let me add just a few words on the importance of the
Midrasha. What this country needs is not only science and technology. But the spirit of the pioneering – and we shall need it for many, many years. The spirit of pioneering is the moral power which springs from vision and the belief in vision, and which arms the man imbued with it to overcome obstacles which appear insurmountable to the ordinary person. Every project in the Negev demands such a spirit, and every project strengthens that spirit. Without it, it is not easy to live in the Negev.

But the Negev, more than any other region, has a special quality which evokes in man wonderful powers which are normally dormant, or which he is unaware of, powers which reside in every individual, but which rarely come to the surface. The Negev turns an ordinary person into a creative human being. This spirit of pioneering is also demanded of Israel’s scholars, and particularly its teachers. Our teachers must not be simple people who have mastered the art of imparting knowledge of a particular subject; They must be guides in the full sense of the word – or teachers in the old sense of the word – People who by their spiritual quality and by their integrity serve as an example to their pupils.

“And this is the purpose of Midreshet Sde Boker. We seek to build a scientific research and teaching center which will be a source of moral inspiration and courage, rousing people to a sense of mission, noble, creative and fruitful.”

David Ben Gurion
January 1965

Maybe, finally, the desert will bloom.

About the author

themiddle

32 Comments

  • Great, because ya’ know “if ‘ya can’t get laid in Israel, ‘ya can’t get laid in a brothel.”

  • Middle, my gentile translation of this text: it’s about the desert. I’ve got a long way to go, clearly.

    A Jewlicious Love Store’s coming (!!) soon? Wow! I thought Esther was too busy blogging.

    Or will Jewish Mother be taking the lead?

    Anyway, thanks for reaching out to those in the Jewlicious commentariat who are, in fact . . . virgins.

    (You know who you are.)

  • Tom, the precise nature of my involvement with the Jewlicious Love store has yet to be determined.

    Muffti made me laugh. (Because I saw the Aristocrats yesterday, and haven’t been able to get that filthy joke out of my head yet.)

  • Are you crazy?
    None of the JAPs I grew up with would go for this.
    No restaurants or shopping for miles around. Do you honestly think you’re gonna get any Jewish, uh, tuchus without taking her out for dinner first?

    Well, maybe an out-of-town prutzah…

  • Ben-David,
    Let’s leave the anti-Jewish female slurs to the Nazis that Muffti deals with. Having it come from within is what causes our population to dewindle. And just to our defense, I grew up on Long Island’d North Shore and have been known to put out without dinner first, so there.

  • Since when is JAP a slur? I go to a university crawling with them. These creatures exist. And maaan, are they boring.

  • Sorry Michael, I’m showing my age. Way back in the day, when I was in college, “JAP” was considered to be a very derogatory, anti-semetic, anti-female term. In fact, it was forbidden to use that term to describe someone that way during sorority rush, the time-honored Ivy tradition that sorts Freshman females into Houses according to how much they put out

  • their interests. Obviously it depends on the context it’s used in. For example “you are not going to get any Tuchas from a JAP before dinner unless she is an out of town prutzah”

  • I suppose today it is totally politically correct to say something like “that girl is so Jappy her tiny dog that lives in her Birkin is wearing a Gucci tee-shirt that says “JAP”. I’m down with that.

  • Fascinating. Today the trend of the American youths about to enter college is a post Gothic type of disinterested boredom. They have seen a President tell the country that he is making a war, that is, he will sacrifce boys and girls their age, because Sadam has WMD. Then it is reported that there never were, they
    knew they never knew, who knows but the war continues and obviously there will soon be a draft most likely as people are not swarming to go to freakin Iraq.
    Moving back on topic, in Israel, the IDF that I served in, you had the ultimate Israeli experience.

  • JAPs are jewish american / australian / armenian princesses / princes. anyone who does one or more of the following things is a jap:
    flaunt wealth
    chew gum
    drink coffee at a tender age
    destroy other people socially
    giggle for no reason when talking to a fellow.
    etc. that’s more the australian version though…

  • jap and white trash are the only two perfectly valid, p.c. approved ethnic slurs i can think of. anymore? Guido, perhaps?

  • Chutzpah wrote:
    And just to our defense, I grew up on Long Island’d North Shore and have been known to put out without dinner first, so there.
    – – – – – – – – –
    … which confirms that, by the standards of a Manhattan JAP, you are an out-of-town prutzah…

    Quod Erat Demonstratum

  • Yes, JAP is totally un-PC, as evidenced by the unfortunate free-fall demise of a poorly executed joke concerning Mattel’s prototype JAP Barbie. Wanna see a non-JAP get real mean? It’s ugly.

    But I digress. Actually, there really are such things as Jewish American princes and princesses. They live in a (real) castle dorm at Brandeis, my beloved alma mater. Don’t believe me? Check this out: http://www.brandeis.edu/studentlife/reslife/tour/castle.html

  • Jap is an earned label. It refers to people who let their high earnings make their kids very spoilt, and unable to appreciate the simple things in life. To each his own of course, but these japs are usually loud, useless, unless exceeding attractive. It can be boys also.

    In Israel, this doesn’t exist much as the army experience usually gives people some spine and chutzpah.

    Many adults are japs also. Fat middle ages men who can’t clean their own front porch, women who can’t do much better. The need for constant luxury and comfort.

    The term is largely lost from the landscape. I believe many official Jews wrote many tired and long winded articles begging others to cease and desist from using the term, and it had some effect. But like OBL, it is still around.

  • I have just wandered onto this website and am totally blown away by the high intellectual level of the discourse. It certainly is reflective of the expensive educations you were afforded and makes me proud to be Jewish and comforted by the thought that the future of our people is in such capable hands.

  • Karen, trust me when I tell you that my expensive education was a waste.

    In the meantime, since you’ve just stumbled on to this site, you may wish to look around a bit before hitting the sarcasm button. I mean, if you’re going to be critical, at least gather some evidence first.

  • Karen: My education wasn’t expensive at all! That’s because I was educated in Canada where a BA and 2 Law degrees cost less than one year at Brandeis.

    That having been said, during our last Jewlicious birthright israel trip our tour guide Yael told the kids all about David Ben Gurion and Sde Boker and how beautiful thee view was etc. but when she told the kids about the tradition described in this post – well, then they got really interested! Of course no one availed themselves of the facilities in order to join the uh… Yard High Club, but still – they gained valuable insight into Israeli culture without having to wade through friggin YNet!

    Look Karen! No spelling errors!

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