The news is awash with reports of gunmen gone wild all across the West Bank and Gaza. I can’t really be bothered with all the details really – suffice it to say that it usually involves groups of gunmen from one militia or another protesting against something or marching in solidarity with something else, usually while firing into the air. Or taking pot shots at gunmen from other armed gangs. If you care, here are some stories you can read. The photo above, which appeared on the cover of this morning’s Jerusalem Post, shows a Palestinian gunman from the Al-Aqsa Martyrs Brigades in Tulkarem firing into the air as he and supporters of the group protest against statements made by Khaled Mashall, head of Hamas’ political bureau in Syria. Mashall was denounced by protesters as a “dirty animal.”
What intrigued me more than all the political infighting and what this might auger for the future of the Hamas government, was well… looking at that photo I thought “Man! Those are some majorly pimped out assault rifles!” I can understand getting expensive mods if you’re some kind of bad ass commando dude, but why spend all the money if you’re just some low level Palestinian militia ass clown? Is the pimpitude of one’s assault rifle in inverse proportion to one’s fighting prowess and/or penis size? How customized does an M-4 or an AK-47 need to be if its main purpose is to fire bullets into the air?
And what of the expense involved? How much are the cash strapped Palestinians spending so that they can look like Rambo-esque bad asses to the photogs from the AP, Agence France Presse and Reuters? Let’s see, here’s a little list:
Samson Flashlight mount – $49 – $149
Tri-Tech Sling – $65
Surefire Flashlight – $129
Aimpoint Rifle Scope – $420
Aimpoint Magnifier Mount – $219
Harris Bipod – $89
Phantom Flash Suppressor – $29.95
ERGO Tactical Grip – $49.95
Vertical Grip Magazine Carrier – $39.95
5.56mm (M4) 7.62 mm (AK-47) ammo – 1000 rounds, $200
AK-47s can be had in Gaza for about $200 a pop and the lighter, more modern M-4s for about $400.
Man. That’s a lot of money – especially given that the average gunman earns about $200 a month – when they get paid.
Remember when Palestinian Prime Minister Ismail Haniyeh said that the Palestinian people would not bow down to the threatened cut off of international aid? Rather than renouncing violence and recognizing the state of Israel, Palestinians under the leadership of Hamas were willing to “eat salt and olives.”
He added that Hamas was not a stupid organization, saying: “I am not a clown and none of ministers of my government are dumb.”
Relax Ismail! But here’s a piece of advice – forget salt and olives dude! If you’re hungry, tell your peeps to EAT THEIR FUCKING GUNS – with a side order of ammo. Yum!