This just in: the Red Hot Chili Peppers are coming to Israel, scheduled to perform in Tel Aviv’s Park Hayarkon on September 10, 2012. According to Haaretz, “tickets will go on early sale for a special price of NIS 320, going up to NIS 390 once the early sale is over. Premium and VIP tickets will also be available for NIS 750 and NIS 1200 respectively.”

After the visits of Air Supply, Whitesnake, and Roxette, whose last hits peaked around the time of the 2nd Temple’s destruction. For this reason, music snobs, please save the “they don’t rock like they used to” comments. We’re just happy to get them when they’re still relevant. Maybe we’ll even get something the likes of which we saw in spring 1992 when Guns n’ Roses played here, causing Axl Rose to yell onstage, “Shalom motherf*****s!” (Well, I didn’t see it. I was here on Year Course and missed it. No excuses.)

And if anyone out there is actually still wondering, “why does Tel Aviv get all the concerts?”, the answer is simple. Do you really want to see Flea wear a kittel? (This question ensures that I will finally reach page one for the all-important “Flea wears a kittel” search query.) Last year, “Sex and the City 2” ads were banned in Jerusalem. If the Chili Peppers played the Holy City’s Teddy Stadium, we’d have to hear the title track from their classic album performed as “Blood Sugar Shas Magik.” And who wants that?

 “Put a shirt on! It’s cold!(Wait, he knows he can’t be buried in a Jewish cemetery, right?
Yet another moment where I wish I could PhotoShop.)

In fact, I was able to dig up their setlist from their last trip to Jerusalem. Hopefully we’ll hear some of these again.

Give It Away (Nu, Your Money! TEN PER CENT!)

Suck My Kishke

Under the Bimah

Higher Ground (The Dome of the Rock…it will be ours again!)

Breaking the Goy

Soul to Shlep

Aeroplane (for my ten kids)

Lox Rollercoaster

Scar Talmud

Around the Vos



Yeah, they should definitely play Tel Aviv. Israel, here they come. (In nine months.)

cross-posted on

About the author


Since making aliyah in 2006, Benji Lovitt has spent roughly every waking moment doing one of the following: trying to make people laugh, eating chumus, or writing about chumus to make people laugh. In addition to working with tons of Jewy organizations to promote Israel, Benji has performed stand-up comedy about Israel for groups including Hillels, Birthright Israel, Jewish Federations, and of course, at Jewlicious Festival. His perspectives on aliyah and life in Israel have been featured on Israeli television and radio and in publications such as the Jerusalem Post, Haaretz, and the Jewish Daily Forward. It is said that every time he calls CK "Mr. Jewlicious", a tree is planted in the Jewish National Fund forest. For a hilarious comedy show, contact him at


  • I had a dati friend who wouldn’t listen to the Red Hot Chili Peppers because she was convinced that there was something innately “evil” about their music. She wasn’t a freak or anything, she listened to all kinds of other “secular” music without a problem, but something about the Peppers kind of frightened her. Now she’s not religious or living in Israel anymore and was at one point engaged to a tattooed Italian guy. As for me, I’ll just listen to them on my iPod because those are some expensive tickets! We are thankful for another BDS failure.

  • I had a dati friend who wouldn’t listen to women singing in public. He is planning to attend the Red Hot Chili Peppers concert.

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